The Shattered Shaft
by thecolorsilver
Summary: What would have happened if Ichigo had been turned into a complete hollow when he was put into the Shattered Shaft? I think he would have become an Arrancar very quickly, and then an Espada. See what happens once this occurs.
1. Chapter 1: Welcome, Inoue

Hey, So I know that I'm already doing a re-do on my story. But I realized how short my chapters were and I decided to put them together to make them longer. I'll have less chapters but at least they won't be so frickin' short.

So, sorry to put these out yet again.

---

Ichigo had a difficult time thinking about his former life. The life he had now was immeasurably better than the one he had before, and yet, he couldn't help but wonder what it would have been like to have continued on with what he had. He sighed and closed his eyes.

"Is there something wrong, Ichigo?" Ichigo looked up. Aizen was watching him from the head of the table. The Espada were all in a meeting. "You seem to be tired. Is something troubling you?" He had a look of concern on his face, though Ichigo knew it was all fake.

"No, no I'm fine. I'm sorry. Please continue." He sat up and listened to what Aizen was saying.

Grimmjow kicked him under the table. Ichigo looked to him. "Having nightmares again, little one?" He whispered.

"Shut up." Ichigo shook his head. "Listen to Aizen-sama." Grimmjow had to be the most annoying hollow Ichigo had ever come across. He couldn't stand him at all, and he was sure Grimmjow felt the same about him. But Ichigo endured him for the short time the meetings lasted. It was for Aizen's sake.

"As I was saying." Aizen took a drink of his tea. "We have just captured a lovely young woman named Inoue Orihime."

"Inoue?" Ichigo looked surprised. "Inoue Orihime?"

"Yes." Aizen smiled. "I understand she was a friend of yours when you were still a human?"

"Well, yes." Ichigo still looked a bit shocked. He would have never suspected that Aizen would kidnap one of his friends. He had gotten quite used to the fact that he was a hollow and that everything he was doing was for Aizen's sake. He had even decided that he would kill humans if need be. His heart had changed and he was now on the side of evil. Everything about him was different

"Ichigo, I would like you to be the one to look after her."

"What?" Ichigo turned to him." He smiled a little. "Of course."

"Thank you. I knew I can trust you with this." Aizen smiled. "This meeting is over. Thank you for coming, everyone." Then he looked at Ichigo. "I will take you to her room."

"Thank you." Ichigo stood and followed Aizen. They walked down the corridors and finally came to a door.

"She is in this room. Please, don't hesitate to speak with her. I know you had a relationship with her. She is probably frightened right now. Comfort her." Aizen started walking away.

Ichigo let out a breath. He opened the door and walked in. Orihime was sitting on the couch in the room. She looked up and saw Ichigo. "Kurosaki-kun?" She looked like she didn't quite believe it could be him. "Kuro…" She stood up and walked to him, putting her hands on his shoulders. She looked at his face as though she were examining him. "It is you, isn't it?" She glanced to the floor. "I…thought you were dead." Tears fell from her eyes. "You're not dead."

"No, I'm not." He stepped back so she wasn't touching him anymore. "Please, sit down." It bothered him to be touched by her. He hadn't really had that happen for a long time: contact. It just didn't seem natural to him.

"Oh, okay." She walked to the couch and sat down, wiping the tears from her face. Then she looked at him. "What are you doing here?" She looked a little happy. "Are you here to save me?"

"Not quite." He leaned up against the wall across from her. "I'm here to watch over you. To make sure that nobody _does_ save you." He sounded very serious. He knew this would upset Orihime but he had to tell her at some point. He was just a little afraid of the reaction.

"But…" She sat forward. "Why would you do that?" She looked a little scared. "And why are you wearing that outfit? It looks just like the one that other hollow was wearing."

He sighed. She was starting to get annoying. "Because, Inoue, I am just like that other Arrancar. I'm an Espada, now. I'm a hollow."

Her eyes widened in fear. She sat back on the couch. "No." She shook her head. "No, it's not true. You're lying." She buried her face in her hands. "It's not true."

"Fortunately it is true, Inoue. It's my duty to keep you here, protected, so that Aizen can utilize you as he wishes. I'm not sure what he wants but I'm sure he has a plan." He pushed himself away from the wall. "Don't worry, he won't hurt you."

"He already has." She yelled, looking up at him. "He's taken you away from me."

"You can thank Urahara for that one, actually." He smiled. "If it weren't for him I'd still be some weak human, like you."

She shook her head again. "No, this isn't you. This isn't Kurosaki-kun. You're not him, I know it."

"Sorry, Inoue. But it's me." He sat down on the couch next to her and moved her hair back behind her shoulders. She shivered. "I guess we'll be seeing a lot of each other from now on. Lucky me."

She closed her eyes. "You're not him."

He sighed. "I'm afraid you'll have to get over that. You'll soon realize I really am me." He stood up. "I'll have some food brought in here for you. I'm sure you're hungry." He started walking out. "See you soon, Inoue." He opened the door and left.

"How do you like babysitting the babe?" Grimmjow stood outside Orihime's door.

Ichigo shut the door and looked at him. "Why is that any of your concern?" He walked past him. The least amount of conversation with Grimmjow was the best. It prevented fights and other negative occurrences.

"I do wish Aizen would have picked me to take care of her. We could have done a lot of fun things together while I was 'taking care of her.'" Grimmjow smiled.

"Do you want me to kill you?" Ichigo turned around. "Cause I will."

"Aww, don't talk that way about a friend, Ichigo." Grimmjow caught up with him. "Just let me have a few minutes with her."

Ichigo grabbed the hilt of his katana. "You better be quiet right now, Grimmjow."

"Right, alright." He started walking away. "I'll see you later, then." He laughed and left.

Ichigo leaned against the wall and covered his face with his hand. This was too difficult. He should have asked to have someone else take care of her. Ulquiorra would be better suited to the task.

"Ichigo." Ichigo looked up. Ulquiorra was staring at him from twenty feet away. "What are you doing here?"

"Nothing. I just got done talking to Inoue."

"The human?" Ulquiorra walked up so he was closer.

"I'm supposed to be taking care of her." Ichigo looked towards her room. "But it's going to be a little difficult." He leaned his head back so that he was looking at the ceiling. Out of all the Espada, he felt closest to Ulquiorra and Stark. The rest just seemed annoying to him. Sure, some were tolerable, like Barragan. But pretty much they were all ridiculous. His true friend, however, was gone now. Neliel. She used to be his greatest friend before she disappeared one day. He still didn't know why that had happened. But when it did, he was given her rank: 3.

"She really was a friend of yours?" Ulquiorra asked.

"Yes, when I was a human." Ichigo let out a breath. "If I was still a human I'm sure I would be trying to save her from this place right now."

"And will you try to save her, now?"

"Of course not." Ichigo turned to him. "I'll keep her here no matter what happens. I am loyal to Aizen-sama above all else."

"That's good to know." Ulquiorra started walking past him. "You should get something to eat. You look pale."

Ichigo was annoyed. Ulquiorra said that at the end of pretty much every conversation they had. Was it to pester him, or did he really always look pale? And who was he to talk? Ichigo walked towards his room.

When he got there, there was a tray of food on his small table. He sighed. Ulquiorra probably ordered it for him. He went up and took the piece of bread from the plate and walked away, taking a bite. What was he going to do? He would have to see her nearly every day, now. Would she make him remember how he used to be when he was a human? What would that do to him? This wouldn't be good, what was Aizen thinking?

"Inoue…" He thought about how he used to see her every day at school. How he barely knew her, but that he still was her friend somehow. So strange. He closed his eyes. Then he walked over to the table and set his bread on the plate, looking at the food. He wasn't hungry.

"Something seems to be troubling you." He turned to the door. Stark was leaning against the door frame. "What's wrong?"

Ichigo let out a breath and sat down on his couch. "It's the human." He brought his hand up to his face and covered his eyes. "I know her."

"It sounded like it from our meeting." Stark looked back outside of Ichigo's room. "What are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing, I guess. Besides look after her."

Stark crossed his arms in front of his chest. "You could always ask Aizen to have someone else watch over her if it's too much for you, you know."

"I couldn't possibly do that. It would make me seem weak. I have to just do it myself." Ichigo shook his head. "I can do it. I know I can." He looked up at Stark.

"Alright. Just be careful." Stark walked away.

A woman walked in. "Ichigo-sama?" She had long blonde hair and blue eyes. The remains of her hollow mask was a small ring that went all around her head near her forehead with small spikes protruding from it. It almost looked like a small crown. She sat down on the floor in front of Ichigo. "What's wrong?"

"I need you to do something, Aya." Ichigo looked at her. Aya was Ichigo's fraccion. He wasn't very comfortable with the whole idea of keeping fraccion, so he only had one. But once he got used to the whole thing it didn't seem that bad to have one around.

"What is it?" She put her hands out on her knees.

"I need you to go and get some food for Inoue Orihime. I said I'd bring her some."

"The human? The one who was captured?" She put a hand on the ground and leaned back. "Why do you want to help _her_ out?"

"She needs to eat _something_, Aya." He stood. "Just go and get something for her and have it sent quickly."

"Fine, fine." She stood and left.

After a moment he walked over to a wall where a mirror was attached. He looked at himself for a moment, trying to remember what he was like when he was a human. He was so different now. He put his hand on his chest where the hollow hole was covered by his clothes. He looked up at his face. The remains of his hollow mask weren't very noticeable. A line of bone ran down his neck and to the middle of his collar bone. He covered it with his uniform. Most of the time he forgot it was even there. But when he did it still seemed so foreign to him.

"Something wrong again, Ichigo-sama?" Aya stood at his door. "I had them bring food to her ladyship." She walked up and stood behind and to the side of him so that she could see herself in the mirror as well. She took his arm and pulled it down so he wasn't touching his ear anymore. "Thinking about your past again?" She smiled. "Don't." She kissed his hand. "We're your life, now." She leaned her head against his shoulder. "_I'm_ your life, now." She smiled, softly.

"I should…go see Inoue, now." He pulled his hand away from hers and started walking away.

"Just remember," He stopped, but didn't look at her, "She's only a human. She's nothing compared to me."

He looked to the side. "I know that." He walked out of his room.

As he walked down the hall he saw Nnoitra. Nnoitra smiled at Ichigo. "So, Ichigo…" Ichigo looked disgusted. He didn't even want to know what filth would come out of his mouth this time. "How are you doing today? Especially now that you get to take care of a human. And one like_ her_…"

"What would you know of Inoue?" Ichigo walked past him.

"She's quite beautiful, I know that." He smiled.

"How would you know that?" Ichigo shook his head. "You've never even seen her."

"Oh, I haven't?" Ichigo stopped walking. "For your information, I just talked with her. What a cutie, huh?" Nnoitra leaned against the wall in the hallway, preparing himself for Ichigo's fury. Ichigo was a pretty relaxed arrancar, but Nnoitra wasn't a complete idiot, he knew this wouldn't be something that he would be happy about. But that was what he was counting on. He had been wanting to fight Ichigo since he had taken Neliel's rank. Maybe he would get the chance right now.

"Oh, you did?" Ichigo tried to act casual. "And how did that go, Nnoitra?" He gritted his teeth. If Nnoitra did anything that upset Inoue…

"Just fine, I think. She seemed so sad, so I comforted her. You know…" In an instant Ichigo was in front of Nnoitra with his katana drawn and Nnoitra was blocking him with his own katana. "Oh, come now!" Nnoitra laughed. "You didn't let me finish. Nothing happened. I just talked with her. You know how I love a good conversation." Ichigo put more forced into his attack and his sword almost made contact with Nnoitra's body. "I swear!" Nnoitra pushed back. "You need to take things less seriously." He smiled. Then he kicked Ichigo in the stomach which made him fly backwards and into the wall behind him. "Misunderstandings occur when you do things like that." He quickly ran to him and attacked, but Ichigo stopped him.

"I'd never trust you, no matter what you say." Ichigo pushed Nnoitra's katana away and slashed the front of his chest. Nnoitra's eyes widened as blood dripped onto the ground.

"Damn you!" He lifted his katana got ready to attack Ichigo when they both heard a voice.

"Please…can we try to act civil?" Aizen stood not too far from them.

Nnoitra backed up and set the bottom of his katana on the ground, breathing deeply a little. He was angry that he was in pain. He was planning on kicking Ichigo's ass, not the other way around. But it wasn't like that had happened, really. They had just started. Things could have gone either way if _Aizen_ hadn't come.

"I apologize, Aizen-sama." Ichigo bowed.

Nnoitra looked at Ichigo, then at Aizen. "Yeah, I'm sorry." He looked away. "Tch."

"Thank you, Ichigo. Thank you Nnoitra. You do understand that you are both very important to me. I would hate to lose either of you. Please, be careful." Aizen walked away.

"You're lucky he came along, Ichigo. You'd be dead otherwise." Nnoitra pointed at him.

"Sure I would." Ichigo started walking away. "Sure I would…" Nnoitra yelled a few threats at him as he walked away, but Ichigo wasn't listening.

When Ichigo got to Orihime's room he opened the door and smiled. "Hey." He looked at the tray that had been put in her room. The food hadn't been touched. He let out a breath. "Why haven't you eaten?"

"Not hungry." She looked away.

He sighed. "You have to eat, Inoue."

"Hmph." She crossed her arms.

He looked at the ground. "Please?" He glanced at the tray then up at her, smiling.

"Why!" She turned to him. "Why does it matter? You're all just going to kill me anyways!"

"No we're not. Aizen wants you for something. If he does, then he wants to keep you as healthy as possible." Ichigo leaned against the wall. "You'll be fine, I promise."

"What does he want me for, then?"

"I have no idea. I don't know too much about you. Sorry." He shrugged. "Do you have any powers? I mean, you must if he brought you. What are your powers?"

"Oh. Well…" She brought her fingers up to her hair pins. "I have three powers."

"Three? That's nice."

She frowned. "Are you making fun of me?"

"No, no." He put his hands up in front of himself. "No, I'm serious. Three is a good number. What do they do?"

"Heal, defend, attack." She tried to look impressive.

"Really? So, if I were to get hurt right now you could heal me?" He looked at her.

"Yes."

"How about this then?" He took off his shirt. She blushed, then she saw the hollow hole in his chest. She tried to ignore it. Turning around he showed her the bruise he got when Nnoitra slammed him against the wall after kicking him. "Could you heal that?"

"Yes." She closed her eyes and nodded. "Of course. But…"

"But what?" Ichigo was holding his shirt.

"You're…an enemy."

"Oh, come on, Inoue. We're still friends. You do know that, right?" He sat down next to her on the couch. She took in a breath. She was so close to him and he had no shirt on. It was like all her dreams were coming true, only…he was a hollow.

She coughed a little and looked away. "Do I know that? I don't know…"

"We are. Of course we are." He let out a breath.

"Oh, I'm not stupid Kurosaki-kun. I know you'd kill me in an instant if you had to. You're completely changed. You only look like Kurosaki-kun. You're not him anymore."

"That's so mean to say stuff like that." He tried to look sad. She couldn't tell if he was acting or not, which of course he was. Finally he noticed her nervousness and leaned forward, putting his hand on hers, speaking softly. "Please, Orihime…for me."

She blushed and looked away. "I guess…if I could heal that other hollow's arm I can heal you." She pointed at him. "Turn around." He did. She looked at his back. "It's a pretty bad bruise."

"Is that bad, does it mean you can't heal it?"

"No, I can still heal it, I was just wondering how you go it." She put her hand out and touched the bruise. On the right top side of his back was a small '3.' She wasn't sure what that meant, but she assumed it was a rank or something. All she really knew was that it was one more thing that separated the human Kurosaki-kun from the hollow Kurosaki-kun.

He looked at the door. "I fought with Nnoitra. He said that he had…did anyone other than me come to talk to you while I was gone?"

"Hmm? Oh, no. It's only been you." She brought her hand away from his back.

"Really?" He growled. So, Nnoitra only said that to bait him into a fight. Damn him. All of the sudden he saw there was a yellow glow coming around him. He turned his head.

"Don't move. I'm healing you." She had her hands over the sphere. "It won't take too long. Just wait a few moments."

"Oh, okay." He held his hands together. How could a human have the power to heal someone else? She must be very powerful. No wonder Aizen wanted her.

"Alright. We're finished. You can turn around now, Kurosaki-kun." She sat back on the couch.

He turned around. "Thank you."

"Of course."

"You know…if you want you can call me Ichigo. Everyone here calls me Ichigo. It kind of sounds weird to have someone call me by my last name all of the sudden." He started putting on his shirt again.

"What?" She tried to comprehend this. Calling Kurosaki-kun by his first name? Could she even do that? She looked confused.

"It's fine if you don't want to."

"No…no I will." She gulped. "Ichigo-kun."

"See, not hard at all." He smiled.

"Yeah," She laughed, nervously. "Ichigo-kun, you're right."

"You're not going to say my name every time you talk, are you?" He looked at her as though he were asking a very important question.

"No, Ichigo-kun! Definitely not." She shook her head.

He sighed. It might have been better for her to just call him 'Kurosaki-kun' after all.

---

Ichigo didn't know how many days it had been since Orihime had been captured. He went to see her at least once a day to check on her. Something about her amused him. Her emotions, her spirit. Her belief that, somehow, he was still good inside. He enjoyed showing her that this wasn't true.

Ichigo looked up. He was in another one of Aizen's meetings. Aizen took a drink of his tea and invited everyone else to drink theirs as well. Ichigo really could care less about these meetings. He didn't like gatherings like these. They bored him. Mostly because he had to be in the same room with people like Grimmjow and Nnoitra.

Aizen set his tea cup down. "I have news." Ichigo looked at him. "We have some very interesting intruders in Hueco Mundo." He smiled. "But I doubt they're anything to be worried about. I assume they are here for the girl." He took another drink. "But don't do anything rash like going to find them. They will come to us and we'll take care of them here."

Nnoitra and Grimmjow looked happy at the prospect of killing living beings.

Ichigo thought about this. This meant that people that he knew were coming. That meant that he would have to kill them. He closed his eyes and thought of Rukia. Could he kill her?

"Everyone may leave, now." Aizen stood.

Everyone left. Ichigo walked out, slowly. "Do you know the humans who are coming?" Ulquiorra walked beside him.

Ichigo looked at him. "I think I know one who might be coming."

"You'll have to kill them if you see them." Ulquiorra kept walking.

"I know that, believe me." Ichigo smiled at Ulquiorra. "Don't worry, I _will _kill them."

"Good." Ulquiorra started walking away. "I knew you'd do the right thing."

Ichigo walked up to Orihime's door and opened it. She smiled. "Ichigo-kun!"

"Hello, Orihime." He walked in and shut the door. As she had started calling him by his first name he had started calling her by her first name. She had made sure this was how it was. She said it wasn't fair that she addressed him informally if he still addressed her formally. So, he agreed and now called her 'Orihime.' "How are you doing?"

"Better now." She stood and hugged him. Orihime had been so lonely in this room by herself all day long. The only contact she ever had was with Ichigo or the people that brought her her food. She was completely alone. So, when she was able to see Ichigo something inside of her came to life again.

He looked awkward. That was the first time she had hugged him. In fact, this was the first time he had ever hugged Orihime. He wasn't hugging her back. He was just standing there, his arms at his side with her arms around him. She stopped hugging him and stood back. "That was a pathetic hug, Ichigo-kun."

He sat down on the couch. "I'm not used to hugs or things like that anymore."

Orihime sat down on the couch next to him. Ichigo thought about what to say. Should he tell her that people were coming to save her? She would find out eventually.

"People have invaded Hueco Mundo."

"Invaded Hueco Mundo? Why? Are they humans?"

"They are probably humans. And they are probably here to rescue you." He turned to her.

She closed her eyes. "Really?" A few tears fell from her eyes. "Oh, that would be wonderful." She brought her hands up and covered her face. "I can't believe it."

Ichigo was a little annoyed. She seemed relieved, happy. She didn't understand that it didn't matter if people came to save her, it wouldn't work. They would be killed, even if it had to be himself that did it.

"What's wrong?" Orihime looked at him.

He shook his head and sat back, grinning a bit. "It's just…you're so happy. I don't know why. Do you honestly think we'll let them even see your face? Orihime, we will kill them, and you'll stay here, just as you should."

Orihime stared at him for a moment before looking away. "Ichigo-kun, can I ask you to do something for me?"

He sighed. "What?"

"Take me home." She turned to him. "You want to go home, too. See your dad, see your sisters. Please, Kurosaki-kun, let's go home."

He looked down with his eyes. "Home."

She smiled. "Yeah."

He looked up at her. "I have no home." He ran his hand through her hair. "And I would rather die than take you back to yours." He stood and began walking out of the room.

"Who?" Orihime stood. Ichigo stopped. "Who came?"

He turned back to look at her. "No idea. Though I assume it would be Rukia and anyone else she could find."

"Rukia?" Orihime looked sad. "Then…you don't know?"

Ichigo smiled. "What, did she find some new idiot to do her bidding?"

"Ichigo, Rukia's dead. She was executed in the Soul Society."

His expression dropped. He stood still for a moment. "She's better off."

Orihime looked hurt. "But…"

He tightened his hand into a fist. "She's better off not being with weak friends who can't even protect her." He looked into her eyes. "You have powers, don't you? Ishida, he's a Quincy. _Why_ couldn't you save her?"

Orihime held a hand up to her chest. "We went, Sado-kun, Ishida-kun, Yoruichi-san and I. But…we weren't strong enough. I'm sorry. We tried, but we barely made it out ourselves. You weren't there…so there was no way we could have won."

"Did you count on me to do everything?" He walked up to her. "Are you that pathetic?"

"No, I-"

"And now you're counting on your friends again, knowing that you'll be the cause of their death. You useless human!"

"I'm sorry!" Orihime backed up and hit the wall. "I tried!"

He walked up and took her wrist in his hand. She looked into his eyes, scared. "Because of you, Rukia is dead. And the rest of your friends will be as well."

She breathed in, "why do you care so much?"

He leaned forward. "What?"

"You…care so much about Rukia dying. And you care about everyone else dying, too." She closed her eyes for a moment. He was so close to her and so frightening, nothing like she had remembered. She felt like she had to tell herself to breathe.

Ichigo let go of her wrist. "Wasteful. Rukia's death was wasteful. And your friends are idiots to come here over someone like you." He walked out of the room.

Orihime looked at the door for a moment before falling to the floor. She held her arms across her stomach and breathed in. She closed her eyes, tightly and whispered, "don't come." She took in a breath and looked out of her small window, the only contact she had with the outside world. "Just go. Don't rescue me." She looked at the ceiling. "Please, don't come."


	2. Chapter 2: Encounters

Ichigo wasn't sure just how many days had gone by since he decided he would have to wait for the intruders to arrive at Los Noches. But they should be here by now, he thought. He rested his chin in his hand as he sat, casually, on his couch. He was tired of waiting. It was nearly painful for him. He just wanted to kill them and get it over with. All this waiting was annoying.

"Her ladyship wants to have a word with you." Aya stood at the mouth of his door. She knocked on the wall. "Pronto."

"How would you even know that?"

"Cause I just got done talking with her. I wanted to know what was so great about her, you know?" She smiled.

"Aya, you aren't allowed to talk with the prisoner. You should know that." He stood. "Please, don't do it again."

"Alright, alright I won't." She walked over and sat on his couch. "So, go and talk to her, then." She laid down. "I'll be here."

Ichigo walked down the corridor towards Orihime's room. He was tired. He wasn't getting enough sleep lately. He wasn't quite sure why. It wasn't good, though. He was probably going to get into fights in the near future so he needed all of his strength.

He finally got to her room. After opening the door he saw Orihime sitting on her couch. She looked up at him. She looked very nervous.

"What is it?" He walked in and leaned up against the wall.

"Well…um…I…"

"Yes?"

"Ichigo-kun, I want to ask you something. I…have a proposition for you. Please save the people who came here for me."

"Proposition?" He laughed, crossing his arms. "What do you mean? What could you possibly give me that would make me want to save them?"

Orihime looked directly into his eyes. "Myself."

He was quiet. "Yourself."

"I will give you," she looked down, "myself."

He sighed and was still for a moment before walking up to her and taking her chin in his hand, bringing her face up so she was looking at her. "You're not worth it."

She cringed. After a moment she tried to speak. "Please, I…I'll do anything. Just save them."

He brought a hand up to the side of her face. "You really think you're that valuable?"

She took in a breath. "I am."

He smiled, kindly. "Unfortunately, I'd have to disagree. But it's sweet that you think so much of yourself." He started to walk away.

"Kurosaki-kun would never say…something like that to me." Orihime watched him. "He would never be that way."

Ichigo turned around. "Orihime. I'd like you to see something. Something that not very many people get to see." He put his hand on the hilt of his katana. "What do you think?"

Orihime's eyes widened as he drew his katana. "Slay, Zangetsu."

Ichigo left Orihime's room, shutting the door quietly. Ulquiorra stood outside, waiting. Ichigo turned around. "Hello."

"Why did you show her?" Ulquiorra stared at him.

Ichigo looked at the ground. "So she would know what I really am."

Ulquiorra looked to the door. "What did she do?"

Ichigo turned to him. "She walked up and wrapped her arms around me." He looked away and laughed. "Idiot." He walked away from her room.

"Hey, little one." Ichigo looked up. Grimmjow walked up to Ichigo. "Aizen's called a meeting. I was supposed to come get you. So hurry the hell up." He walked away.

Ichigo watched Grimmjow as he walked away. "Another meeting." He closed his eyes. "They must be here."

---

Ichigo took a drink of his tea. He let out a breath. He took another drink of his tea. He let out another breath. He leaned his chin on the palm of his hand and closed his eyes.

"Try to pretend like you care about these meetings." Stark leaned over and spoke quietly to Ichigo. "It's for Aizen-sama's sake."

Ichigo straightened up in his chair. "Sorry."

"It's fine. Sometimes we just don't think about what we're doing." Stark looked forward as Aizen entered the room, sitting down.

"As you might have guessed," Aizen spoke to everyone, "the reason why I am holding this meeting is because our intruders have finally made it to Los Noches." He smiled, warmly. "Which means, we most dispose of them."

"Finally." Grimmjow laughed. "Can I go now, then?" He stood.

"Not yet, Grimmjow." Aizen put his hand out. "Please…sit." Grimmjow stood for a moment, then reluctantly sat down, a little angry. Aizen addressed everyone, again. "There are only two of them. So, they are hardly a threat."

"Aizen-sama." Ichigo sat forward. Aizen turned to him. "Do you know their names?"

"They were part of the group that came to the Soul Society once. Their names are Ishida and Sado." Aizen turned to everyone. "Right now I am leaving them up to our Priveron Espada. You all need not dirty your hands with them until they prove themselves bothersome enough to defeat them. Do you understand?" He took a drink of tea. Everyone nodded. Except Grimmjow and Nnoitra. Aizen looked at them. "Do you understand?" They both slowly nodded.

Ichigo crossed his arms and let out a soft, "Tch." He was hoping to just kill them off himself. But now he had to let someone else do it? Now he would never find out what Chad's power was like. No…he thought about it. They might just be able to defeat the Priveron Espada. He decided to go looking for their reiatsu. They would probably defeat those Espada by the time he found them.

Aizen ended the meeting and Ichigo went looking for Chad. It took a while because he didn't know what his reiatsu was like, but finally he caught onto a reiatsu that he didn't recognize. When he finally got to it he saw Chad standing next to a defeated Privion Espada. Chad looked up at him, eyes wide.

Ichigo spoke, "Congratulations. However, now you'll have to fight me."

Chad stood, completely still. He wasn't sure what to say. He couldn't believe Ichigo was standing in front of him. It had to be fake. It just had to be. He turned so he was completely facing him. "Ichigo? I thought you were dead."

Gantenbainne looked at Chad. "Run, he'll kill you!"

"No, it'll be fine. He's a friend of mine." Chad looked at Gantenbainne.

"You really should listen to your new friend." Ichigo smiled.

Chad took a step forward. "Ichigo, why are you here? Why are you wearing the same kind of outfit he's wearing?" He tightened his hand into a fist. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he didn't like it.

"I'm here because I live here. I'm wearing this because everyone here wears clothing like this. Because I'm an arrancar now. I'm a hollow." He got ready to attack. "Any other questions?"

"You're a hollow? What? Why?"

"Run!" Gantenbainne yelled at Chad.

"Oh, my. You are getting annoying." Ichigo appeared by Gantenbainne and stabbed him through the neck. Chad took a step back. Ichigo let out an annoyed breath, then turned to Chad. "Because Urahara Kisuke turned me into one." He disappeared and appeared directly in front of Chad, slashing his chest. Chad choked on the air. "I expected more from you, Chad." Chad staggered back and held out his right arm. He brought it back and flung a shot out at Ichigo. Ichigo laughed and dodged it. "What the hell was that?" Ichigo ran at him and slashed his left arm. Chad fell to the ground, kneeling and holding his arm. "I'd like it if you really fought with me, now. It would make this a little more fun." He backed up. "I'll give you the time to get ready." He crossed his arms, holding his katana loosely.

Chad stood up and coughed a little. He held his left arm out and made Brazo Izquierda del Diablo appear. He looked down at his hand. He didn't like this at all. He was hoping to just fight with Ichigo a little and convince him to stop this. He didn't want to kill him. But if he had to…he would. "Ichigo." He looked at him. "I don't want to do this. Let's not fight. Please."

"You don't want to fight?" Ichigo smiled. "Are you begging for your life?"

"No. I'm just saying I don't want to fight a friend." He let both arms drop to his side. "Help us save Inoue."

"I'm afraid I can't do that. I'm the one protecting her from you." He held his katana firmly and ran up to him, but when he went to attack Chad blocked him with his left arm. Ichigo whistled. "So that arm isn't just for show." He backed up. "Show me what it can do." Chad hesitated. This would kill one of his friends, if not his best friend. "Go on, I'll give you one free shot." He held both arms out and left his chest wide open for Chad to hit him. "Do what you will."

Chad looked serious. He brought his left arm back and, with as much force as he could, hit Ichigo in the chest. It very much so pained him to do so. After he had done it tears fell from his eyes. "I'm sorry." He looked away.

"For what?"

Chad looked up. He saw that Ichigo was smiling at him. "How?" Chad backed up. "How are you not dead?"

Ichigo brought his katana up and cut Chad's throat. "I'm sorry."

Chad's eyes widened. He fell to the ground. After a few moments his eyes slowly closed and he was gone.

Ichigo looked at him without emotion. He put his katana on his back and started walking away.

He didn't feel like looking for Ishida right away. He didn't like having a battle right after a battle. He sighed. Perhaps he would entertain himself with Orihime for a while and then go searching for Ishida. He made his way to her room.

When he opened the door Orihime looked at him for a moment, then down to his clothes. "You've been hurt."

He looked down. He had forgotten to change before he came. Chad's blood was all over his clothes. He looked down at the white fabric, stained. "Yes. Actually it wasn't me who got hurt. So you can rest assured." Orihime stood and walked over to him, determined. "Orihime, I just said-"

"You don't know if you're not hurt or not. You were in a fight, right? You could have gotten injured and not known it." She turned him around. "Now that it's over do you feel any pain?" He looked at her as she turned him back around. She looked so worried for him. But why? He had done everything possible to make her not like him, why did she still care? She brought a hand up to his face. "You don't look well."

"I'm fine." He moved her hand away.

"Ichigo-kun, please let me help you!" She looked up at him, worried.

"Why do you care?" He stared at her. "Why do you want to heal me, it makes no sense, you make no sense." She let out a long breath and leaned into him. "Huh?"

She brought a hand up to his neck and tried to breathe in the scent that she always imagined Ichigo had. But there was nothing. She started to cry. "How could I not care for you? You're my friend." She buried her face in his chest. "I love you, Kurosaki-kun."

Ichigo took her shoulders and pushed her away from him. She took in a quick breath. He looked her in the eyes. "Don't ever say that again."

"But, Kurosaki-kun-"

"I told you not to call me that."

She looked down. "Yes."

Ichigo turned around and walked to the door. "It was Chad. I killed him. His blood is all over my clothes." He turned around and pointed at Orihime's dress. There were spots of blood on the fabric. "And now it's on yours as well."

Orihime shook her head. "Ichigo-kun, no! He's not dead."

"I'll have them bring your food. And you'll stay in that dress until you're able to admit that both Chad and Ishida will meet their deaths here. And that it is all your fault." He left.

Orihime brought her fingers up to the blood on her dress. She started crying, "Sado-san."

---

After changing into a set of clothes that were more appropriate for entering a battle Ichigo didn't have to search long to find Ishida. His reiatsu was like a beacon. In about ten minutes he was face-to-face with him.

They stared at each other before Ishida spoke. "I thought you were dead."

"So I've heard." Ichigo took a step towards Ishida.

"Why are you in Hueco Mundo?" Ishida took a step towards Ichigo as well.

"Because, I live here." He waited for Ishida's reaction. He wasn't expecting it to be favorable.

"That can't be possible." Ishida took a step back this time. "Why?"

"Urahara." Ichigo kept moving towards him. "It's all his doing."

"So basically," Ishida got ready to bring his bow out, "you're my enemy."

Ichigo smiled. "You catch on quickly." He took his katana in his hand and got ready to fight.

Ishida slowly let his cross fall and his bow appeared. "I don't like doing this with you, Kurosaki. Isn't there any other way to resolve this? Why can't you help us save Inoue?"

"I'm afraid I can't do that. My loyalties lie with Aizen-sama, now." He appeared before Ishida and swung his katana at his chest. "Nothing can change that."

Ishida disappeared and reappeared about ten feet away. "There has to be some other way." He pulled back an arrow and let it go, aiming it at Ichigo's chest.

Ichigo blocked it with his katana. "Sorry, but there isn't." He held the fabric at the end of the hilt and started swinging his katana around in a circle above his head, then shot it out at Ishida. "I am who I am, now."

Ishida wasn't expecting Ichigo to do this so he didn't move quickly enough and was cut on the shoulder. He dropped to the ground for a moment. "I don't believe that. You can change, I know it."

"You don't even like me anyways." Ichigo held his katana by the hilt again and laughed. "Why do you_ care_?" He ran towards Ishida.

Ishida stood, quickly and pulled an arrow back, letting it go. Ichigo moved out of its range. "It doesn't matter if I like you or not. You still have to be a good person. And I don't hate you anymore, Kurosaki." He tried to find Ichigo, who had disappeared, completely.

Ichigo appeared in front of him and slashed him across the chest. Ishida's eyes widened and he fell to the ground. "You're still so weak." Ichigo stood over him. "How did you ever think you could save Orihime?"

"I had to try." Ishida coughed. Some blood came from the sides of his mouth.

Ichigo shook his head. "You should have just stayed in the real world and let it go."

"I couldn't." He coughed again. Then he brought his bow out. "I still can't." His let off 1,200 arrows straight at Ichigo. Ichigo tried to move but couldn't move fast enough and got hit with a few of them.

He fell to the ground. "Damn it." He held his stomach then brought it away, looking at it. It was covered in blood. "I guess I'll just have to have Orihime heal me again." He looked at Ishida. "After I defeat you, that is."

"You have to stop this, Ichigo. I'm your friend, you can't kill me."

"Are you?" Ichigo thought about this. "Friend." Friends with a Quincy. That was a bit much. "I'm sorry, but I have to kill you." He smiled. "I don't get to kill nearly enough humans, anyways. It'll give me something interesting to do."

"You know you're dad still thinks you're alive somewhere." Ishida spoke in a serious tone. Ichigo stopped moving. "Even after he cried at your funeral he told me that he wasn't certain you were gone." Ishida looked at the floor and sounded a little sad. "I didn't believe him. But now I know he was right." He looked up at Ichigo. "He waits for you, every night in your room, just hoping that you'll come in through your window." Ichigo's hand was shaking a little, so his katana shook as well. "I don't think he'll ever stop waiting for you."

"Shut up!" Ichigo closed his eyes. He didn't want to think about his dad or his family. It bothered him to think about his past, especially that part of his past. He let his head fall and looked at the ground.

"If you came home, it would make him very happy." Ishida spoke. "Your sisters as well."

"I can't leave here, this is where I belong."

"Why not?" Ishida asked. "It's not like you're completely tied to this place. You don't truly belong here. Just because you're a hollow it doesn't mean you should live here, you weren't meant to live in a place like this, come home." Ishida pointed at him. "You can barely even tell you are a hollow. I can't even see your mask."

"It's right here." He pulled down the top of his shirt and showed Ishida the remains of his hollow mask. "So as you can see, I truly am the real thing."

"Come home, Kurosaki. Urahara could get you a gigai, you could live as though none of this happened." He tried to stand.

"And I assume part of coming home entails saving Orihime, as well?" Ichigo crossed his arms.

"Of course." Ishida staggered a bit as he stood. "She doesn't belong here, either."

"You don't look so good." Ichigo walked up and patted him on the shoulder.

Ishida quickly moved away. "Thanks, I know."

Then Ichigo thought of something. "Ishida…it's about Rukia." Ishida's hands tightened into fists. He looked tense. "She really is dead isn't she?"

"Yes, she was executed. We couldn't do anything about it."

Ichigo closed his eyes. "Ishida." Ishida watched him. He held his hand up and a cero grew on the end of his fingertip.

"Kurosaki!" Ishida jumped back. "You don't belong here! Stop fighting for Aizen!"

Ichigo looked up at Ishida as the cero grew. "Goodbye." The cero shot out at him. Ichigo watched as the blinding light made its way to Ishida's form. Suddenly something stood in its way. Ichigo stood up and watched as a girl swallowed the whole of his cero, then shot it back out at him. Ichigo quickly moved out of the way and looked at the girl.

"Nel!" Ishida put a hand on Nel's shoulder. "Are you alright? Can you really do something like that?"

"Nel?" Ichigo walked up to her and knelt over. He pointed to her estigma. "It's you. Why are you a kid?"

Nel backed up. "Who are you?"

"Nel, it's me, Ichigo." Ishida looked back and forth from Ichigo to Nel as Ichigo spoke to her. "Don't you remember me?"

Nel stared at him for a moment. "No."

Ichigo looked at the ground. "Oh."

Ishida knelt over and looked at Ichigo. "You know her?"

Ichigo turned to Ishida. "She's…" he saw the look in Ishida's eyes, wondering why Nel would know someone like Ichigo in a place like this. "Yes, I know her." Ichigo turned to Nel. "Nel, you used to know me."

"No." Nel closed her eyes. "Don't think so."

"We were friends."

"Sorry." She put a hand out. "Don't recognize you."

Ichigo looked down to his wrist. "Then what about this?" He took off a bracelet he had worn since she had disappeared that day. "I found it in your room. You used to wear it. Pesche gave it to you." He put it on her wrist. It was far too big for her. She looked down at it. "It's me, Nel."

Nel looked up at him. "Itsygo?" She peered at him. "Itsygo." She brought a hand up to his head. "Blonde."

"Eh?" Ishida looked at her.

"Your hair was blonde."

Ishida smiled. "I think you're mistaken, Kurosaki's hair is-"

"She means…" Ichigo closed his eyes, speaking over Ishida's words. Ishida stopped as Ichigo looked up at him. "She means when I was a Vasto Lorde."

Nel touched his face. "Itsygo." Ichigo looked down to her. Slowly, a smile grew across her face. "Itsygo!" She jumped on him, and as she did a large amount of smoke erupted around her and swallowed them. By the time it disappeared Ishida saw Nel hugging Ichigo, tightly.

"An adult?!" Ishida pointed at her.

"Ichigo!" Nel sat back.

"I thought you were dead." Ichigo looked at her.

"I nearly was." She stood up. "How are you?"

He looked at the ground as he stood up. "Not sure what to do, really."

"Save Inoue, it's that simple." Ishida took a step forward.

Nel smiled. "We're saving a girl called Orihime."

Ichigo looked up. "So you really are helping them?"

"Yes." She turned serious. "And you should, too."

Ichigo closed his eyes. "Nel…"

"You can do it, Ichigo." She put a hand on his shoulder. "Aizen doesn't rule you if you don't let him."

He sighed. "And what am I supposed to do after I save her? Am I really supposed to do something as idiotic as go back to the real world? Like I could even make it through a day trying to act human. My family would notice right away."

Ishida moved his glasses up. "No offense, Kurosaki, but you weren't exactly lovable beforehand, either. Just don't try to kill them and I think everything will be okay."

Ichigo looked to him. "Thanks."

Nel put her hand out to him. "Come on, Ichigo. Let's go."

Ichigo looked away. Saving Orihime. Going completely against what he had been working towards. He made a noise of aggravation. "Damn you, Nel."

Nel smiled wide. "Thank you, Ichigo!" She hugged him.


	3. Chapter 3: Home, But Not

Nel, Ichigo and Ishida stood outside of Orihime's door. Ichigo slowly turned the handle. What would happen when she found out that he was going to help her? It almost annoyed him to think that she would think he really was good inside. Like she had won. He sighed and opened the door.

Orihime looked up from the couch, her dress still stained in blood. She saw Ichigo and nodded, then Ishida and Nel walked in past him. "Ishida-kun?" She stood. "Ishida-kun!" She ran to him, "You're okay!"

"Yeah." Ishida smiled.

"But, what are you doing here?" She put her hands on his shoulders. "Why did…" She turned to Ichigo. "You saved him, didn't you?"

Ichigo looked away. "Eh…"

"Thank you, Ichigo-kun!" She ran up and hugged him. "I knew you could save him." She held him tightly. "Thank you."

"Yeah." Ichigo slowly moved her away from himself. "But we need you to heal us."

"Huh?" Orihime looked at Ishida and Ichigo's outfits. They were both stained with blood. "You're hurt!"

"_Hence_ the need for healing." Ichigo looked annoyed.

"Ichigo…" Nel shook her head at him. "Kindness."

Ichigo let out a long breath. "Right..."

Orihime looked at Ichigo. "I don't know…" Everyone looked at her. "Are you just going to kill him after I heal him? How can I trust you?" She looked very skeptical.

Ichigo smiled and walked up to her, putting his hand on the side of her face. "How can you not trust _me_?" Orihime stood still. Ichigo leaned in and whispered in her ear. "We're still friends…right?"

"Ichigo!" Nel smacked the back of his head.

"Ow!" He turned to her. "_What_?"

"Leave her alone and let her heal him. And promise you won't kill him afterwards." Nel took Orihime's shoulders and led her towards Ishida. "Promise!" She pointed at him.

"Ugh, I promise." Ichigo sat down on the couch and rested his chin in his hand. "Just heal him so you can heal me."

Orihime looked at Ishida. "Lay down on the ground."

Ishida laid on the ground and Orihime began healing him. He was encased in a sphere of light. Ishida looked at Orihime. "Now all we have to do is find Chad and we can all get out of here.

The room got quiet. Ichigo looked at Orihime. Orihime looked at Ichigo. Nel knew nothing so she smiled. No one spoke. Orihime tucked some hair behind her ear. "We won't be finding Sado-san, Ishida-kun. We'll have to leave without him."

"But, we can't just leave him here. How can you say that, Inoue?"

"Because he's dead. That's how she can say it." Ichigo looked at Ishida.

"Dead?" Ishida turned to Ichigo. "But – how? Did an Espada kill him?"

"Yes." Ichigo sat back.

"Who!" Ishida sat up.

"Please don't be angry at them." Orihime put a hand out. "It was just a misunderstanding."

"It's fine, Orihime." Ichigo put a hand out. "Ishida, it was me. I killed Chad."

"What?" Ishida sat forward. "You killed Chad?" He closed his eyes. "I see." He turned to Orihime. "Inoue, stop healing me."

"What? Why?" She looked nervous.

"Because, I'm going to kill him." Ishida pointed at Ichigo.

"No! You can't!" Orihime shook her head. "You can't kill him, you can't kill each other!" She closed her eyes and made sure to keep her Shun Shun Rikka up. "He's sorry, alright? Right," she walked to Ichigo, "just explain that you're sorry!"

Everyone looked at Ichigo. Ichigo looked at Ishida. "I'm…not sorry. I was doing my job."

"Damn you!" Ishida let his cross drop and let an arrow go, hitting and cracking open the surface of the sphere. When it was gone he shot an arrow at Ichigo. The arrow pierced Ichigo's shoulder.

"Why didn't you dodge!" Orihime shook him, her hands on his shoulders.

Ichigo looked at her. "I don't know."

"Run!" She pointed to the door.

"Never. I'd never run from a human." He turned to Ishida. "You're just second rate compared to me." He took his katana in his hand and pointed it at Ishida. "You could never beat me."

Ishida growled. "You still think you're better than me somehow."

"I've always been better than you and always will be better than you, Ishida. There's no way that will ever change."

Ishida let an arrow go again, aiming at Ichigo's chest. Ichigo dodged it and appeared right in front of Ishida, plunging his katana directly into his stomach and turning it. Ishida gasped.

"Do you still want to fight me?" Ichigo held his katana in Ishida's stomach.

"Kurosaki." Ishida fell to his knees. "Why did you kill him?"

"I had to."

"Stop it!" Orihime ran and put her hands on Ichigo's katana, trying to push it out of Ishida. "Stop, just let him go!"

Ichigo turned to Orihime. "You really want him to live?"

"Yes!" She closed her eyes. "Please!"

"You really should let him live, Ichigo." Nel walked up and put her hand on his shoulder.

Ichigo looked into Ishida's eyes. Ishida was falling into unconsciousness. "Fine." Ichigo pulled his katana out of him. "Heal him, then."

"Ishida-kun!" Orihime caught him as he fell back to the ground. She laid him down and began healing him. "Don't worry…" She watched him as he tried to fall asleep. "Don't worry, soon we'll be home." She leaned her head into Nel's shoulder as Nel knelt beside her.

"You did a good thing, Ichigo." Nel looked up at him.

Ichigo looked away. Then he looked to the door. "Someone's coming." He opened the door and walked out just to see Stark walking up to the door. "What is it? I was just leaving."

"We're having a meeting. You should probably attend." Stark turned around.

---

Ichigo sat down in his chair. Then he noticed it. He was covered in blood. "I should go and come back." He stood.

"You just noticed the blood?" Ulquiorra spoke to him from across the table. "Sometimes you are so…"

"Do you think I have time to change?" Ichigo asked.

"No." Stark shook his head. "Just hope Aizen-sama doesn't notice."

"Hello." Aizen walked to his chair and sat down. "And how is every-" He looked at Ichigo. Ichigo cursed himself. "Get into a fight, did we?"

"Yes. With one of the intruders. But I defeated him."

"I'm glad to hear you're alright." Aizen smiled. "Let's continue with the meeting, then."

Ichigo let out a breath. "We have four new intruders in Hueco Mundo." Everyone looked at him. "And these intruders are _very_ special." He smiled, again. "They are Captains."

"Shinigami Captains?" Stark spoke. "Why would they send Captains here?"

"It's what I was hoping for." Aizen took a drink of his tea. "I'm very pleased to see that it has happened."

Captains? Ichigo thought about this. Who would they have sent? What would they even do here?

"We know the names of the Captains who were sent, as well. Would you like to hear them?" He took another drink of his tea.

"Yes." Nnoitra spoke. "I'd like to hear the names of the men I'll be killing."

"Well, then. We have Unohana Retsu, Zaraki Kenpachi, Kurotsuchi Mayuri and Kuchiki Byuakuya."

Ichigo's heart nearly stopped at that last name. Byuakuya Kuchiki. The man who sentenced Rukia to death. And he was coming here. Ichigo narrowed his eyes. It would be him that would kill Byuakuya. No one else would get the chance to do it.

Ichigo changed into a clean set of clothes and walked into Orihime's room. "I need you to heal me."

Orihime looked up at him. Ishida was sitting on the couch next to her. Orihime smiled. "Of course, Ichigo-kun."

Ichigo looked up at Orihime as he was being healed. "I'm going to kill him."

"Who?"

"Byuakuya."

Orihime shook her head. "Let's just go. Don't worry about him, let's just go home."

"I have to do it, Orihime. For Rukia." He looked up at the ceiling.

"No you don't." Orihime held her hands over the sphere of light. "And I'm not letting you out of here until you promise that you won't kill anyone ever again!"

Ichigo closed his eyes. "I can't promise that, Orihime."

"Yes you can! Just promise!" She put her hands on the ground. "Please…Rukia wouldn't have wanted you to do this. She would have just wanted you to go home. Please."

"She's right, Ichigo. We should just leave." Nel sat down next to Orihime and put her hand on her shoulder. "It's better that we just leave while we can. We could get caught if we stay here much longer."

Ichigo looked to Ishida. "Do you agree with them? Should I just let Rukia's killer go free?"

Ishida turned away. "I don't think you have the right to be angry at someone for killing a person who was innocent."

Ichigo sat up. "I just can't leave. I have to do this."

Orihime stopped healing him. "Then go."

Ichigo stood and walked to the door. "This won't take long."

When Ichigo found Byuakuya he was standing over the dead body of Zommari. "How's Rukia?" Ichigo leaned against the wall.

Byuakuya looked towards him. "I had nearly forgotten about your existence. Pity."

"And I, yours. Unfortunately when I found out that you had actually killed your sister I had to come and take care of you." Ichigo took his katana off of his back. "I promised someone I'd finish this quickly so I'll just start off with everything I have."

----

Orihime sat on the floor of her room trying not to think of the battle that was about to begin. She tried not to think of Ichigo and how much he had changed. How would he get on in the real world? He was so different, so un-human. He was mean and cruel; he wouldn't be able to deal with his old friends. And what would happen to Nel? What would happen to herself? Would all of the Espada really just let them go?

She buried her face in her hands at the thought of it. How would life go on?

All of this time she had been mourning for a person that didn't even exist anymore. And now that she saw him she was still sad. If he could only go back to the person he used to be. If he could only smile at her just once.

"Orihime?" Nel sat down next to her. "Are you alright?"

Orihime turned to face Nel. "Huh?" She stared at her for a moment before she realized what she had said. "Oh, yeah." She looked down at her hands. "I was just…sad."

"About what? Are you worried that Ichigo will get hurt? He won't. He's a very strong fighter."

"No, I'm not worried about that." Orihime shook her head and rested her hands in her lap. "I'm just sad because…he's so different. He used to be kind. Now he's just…scary."

Nel laughed. Orihime looked at her, surprised. "I've never thought of him that way before. I guess to a human he would seem kind of intimidating." She smiled at Orihime. "Don't be afraid of him. He's trying to save you, so he would never hurt you."

Orihime turned toward the window. "Oh." She closed her eyes. "But, he killed Sado-san. And he was going to kill Ishida-kun."

Nel put her hand on Orihime's shoulder. "Don't worry." She paused. "I've seen him fight many times before. And he didn't like what he had to do. He may have said he wasn't sorry about killing your other friend, but he lied." She looked outside of the window as well. "He doesn't…like killing. He just has to kill in order to keep his status. You may not have been able to tell but he was relieved to not have to kill Uryuu." She smiled. "The only one he seems to really want to kill is this new person he just went after."

----

Ichigo stood in front of Byuakuya in resurreccion form. "You don't seem to be taking me seriously, Byuakuya."

"What are you talking about?" Byuakuya's hand was hanging down at his side, trailing blood.

"Your Bankai. You still haven't brought it out. It's an insult that you don't think I'm worthy."

"You're not." Byuakuya brought his katana up in front of his face. "Scatter-"

Ichigo appeared in front of him and clashed his katana to the ground, slicing his chest open. Byuakya jumped back and held his hand over his wound. He looked down to his katana.

"I've had enough of your pathetic shikai." Ichigo picked Byuakuya's katana up. Byuakuya stared at him. Ichigo threw the katana towards him. Byuakuya grabbed the katana before it pierced him, cutting his hand.

He looked at Ichigo. "Why are you so eager to see my Bankai?"

"Curiosity." Ichigo stepped back. "Plus you're rather bad at this stage. I'd like a challenge."

Byuakuya held his katana up. "I'm afraid you'll have to deal with your curiosity for a while longer."

----

"Inoue, what will you do if Ichigo doesn't come back?" Ishida spoke to Orihime from the couch. "We'll have to leave without him pretty soon."

Orihime looked up at him. "He'll come back. I know he will."

"But what if he doesn't."

"He _will_!" She closed her eyes and raised her voice. "Don't say things like that!"

Ishida sat back on the couch. "Why do you care so much about him? He killed Chad. He tried to kill me. He would have killed you if he was ordered. He's not Kurosaki anymore, he's a killer, a murdering Espada. Someone like him shouldn't be alive and we're teaming up with him, trusting him? Why are you doing that?"

Orihime stood and walked up to Ishida. She raised her hand to slap him. He moved back against the couch a little. She stood there with her hand raised for a few moments before letting her arm drop. "Don't say things like that about Kurosaki-kun. He's not a killer. Didn't you just hear what Nel said? He feels bad about having to kill Sado-san."

"He doesn't feel bad. Nel doesn't know him that well, she can't. I could see it in his eyes, he didn't feel bad at all."

"He did feel bad." Nel walked over and held Orihime. "I know him. I've known him for a long time and I've never seen him like that."

"I saw the same Kurosaki you did and he didn't look remorseful at all." Ishida shook his head at Nel and Orihime.

"Then I guess you just don't know him very well. Or you don't know the new him." Nel took Orihime's shoulders and led her back to the middle of the room to sit down. "I wouldn't lie about something like this."

"So stop trying to make things worse, Ishida-kun." Orihime looked back at him as she was sat down. When sat down she looked up at him. "And when we get back to the real world you have to be his friend."

"What?" Ishida sat forward.

----

"I have to admit I'm impressed. You're doing rather well for just being in a battle before this." Ichigo's blade pressed up against Byuakuya's. "You must be tired. Do you need a break?"

"Be quiet." Byuakuya forced Ichigo away from himself and sent the petals from his katana towards him. Some hit Ichigo's arm but Ichigo dodged the rest and cut Byuakuya's arm in turn.

"Where's Rukia, Byuakuya?" Ichigo stabbed him through the chest.

Byuakuya pushed the blade out and slashed Ichigo across the arm. "She's dead."

"Why!" Ichigo moved as Byuakuya attacked. "Why didn't you save her?"

"I couldn't." Byuakuya attacked again, this time making contact with Ichigo's mask. Ichigo jumped back as it was cracked in half. "It was the law. She had to die."

"But…I wasn't there anymore. The whole reason was that I had gotten her powers. If I wasn't there anymore why did she have to die?" Ichigo swung his katana at Byuakuya.

"It didn't matter, what had happened had happened. Rukia's powers were not restored and she had transferred them to you, a felony deserving death. I could do nothing about it."

Ichigo closed his eyes. "A brother not saving his sister." Byuakuya just stared at him. "How sickening."

"I don't need someone like you to tell me what is sickening." Byuakuya pointed his katana at Ichigo. "The real person that killed Rukia is you."

"What?" Ichigo let the hand that was holding his katana drop to his side.

----

"Ichigo-kun was very sad to hear about Rukia's death." Orihime looked down at the ground. "And was really surprised, too. I think he really thought we could save her. You and I, Ishida-kun." She looked up at Ishida.

"Huh." Ishida looked away. "Well if he would have been here we could have."

"It's not his fault he wasn't here. It was because he was trying to save her that he was here and couldn't." She looked at her open hands. "He…got angry that I couldn't save her. I had never seen him angry like that. That's when I first became afraid of him." She closed her eyes. "I never want to see him like that again. It's like…a bad dream."

----

Ichigo clutched the hilt of his katana. "_What_ did you say?" His mask was cracked down the middle, the eye that was showing narrowed, the black peering out at Byuakuya. "Did you just blame Rukia's death…on me?"

"If you wouldn't have taken her powers from her she wouldn't have been sentenced to death. And you have the audacity to be angry at me?"

"Do you know…why I'm in here?" Ichigo started walking towards Byuakuya. "Why I'm a hollow?" His katana shook. "Do you!"

Byuakuya stared at him for a moment. "Anger doesn't become you."

"Shut up!" Ichigo appeared in front of him, slicing his right arm off. Byuakuya's eyes widened. "It's because of Rukia! Because of trying to save her from you!" He stabbed him in the heart. "Because of you I'm stuck in this hell!" Byuakuya coughed. Ichigo pulled his katana out and stabbed him twice again. "Damn you!" It took him a moment to realize that Byuakuya wasn't moving anymore. He let go of him and Byuakuya fell to the ground. Ichigo looked down at him.

Byuakuya looked up at him. After a few moments he tried to speak. Nothing came out for a few seconds until finally he said Rukia's name. There seemed to be something that was supposed to come after it, but he died before it could come out.

----

Ichigo opened the door to Orihime's room and walked in. Everyone had been talking, a heated conversation it seemed. But everyone stopped and looked at Ichigo once he was there. Ichigo looked at them all. "What?" He paused. "What? Is it the blood?"

"Ah, nostalgic." Nel rested her chin in her hand.

"Kurosaki, you look like a freak." Ishida looked away.

"He does not!" Orihime stood and walked over to Ichigo. Then, she slowly looked at him. "Your mask…is broken. And your eye…is black."

"What?" He brought his hand up to his face. "I'm…still in my resurreccion form."

"Good job piecing that together." Ishida kept not looking at him.

"Shut up." Ichigo's resurreccion form disappeared and Orihime was happy that his eyes were no longer black.

"So, did you kill yet another person who didn't deserve to die?" Ishida turned to him.

"He deserved to die!" Ichigo pointed his katana at Ishida. "He killed Rukia and therefore is an enemy! If you would have met him in the Soul Society you would have had to kill him so why can't I kill him here?"

"Good point." Nel stood. "Now, let's go before someone comes."

The door opened. Ulquiorra stared at them. A moment passed by. Ichigo pointed his katana at Ishida. "I've caught the intruders. They were going to try to save Orihime, but I got to them in time."

Ulquiorra paused. "Kill them."

"Oh, I will."

He left. Ichigo sighed and created a portal. Everyone stepped in and soon they were in Karakura town.

Ichigo, Orihime, Nel and Ishida walked out to Karakura town. Ichigo turned to Nel. "Now all we have to do is get gigais and everything will be fine."

"You do that, Kurosaki. As for me, I'm going home." Ishida started walking away.

"Thank you for saving me, Ishida-kun!" Orihime waved at him as he was leaving.

"When are you going to talk to your dad?" Orihime spoke to Ichigo.

"Tonight."

"Why wait until night time? Why not just go as soon as we get you and Nel gigais?"

"Because…I feel like coming in through my window."

When they go to Urahara's Ichigo walked through the front door.

Urahara looked at Ichigo with wide eyes. Nothing was said for a few moments. Finally, Ichigo spoke. "I need a gigai. And one for my friend as well." He gestured to Nel.

"Ichigo? Is that you?" Urahara walked up and poked Ichigo with his fan. "It is, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is." Ichigo nodded. "I'm really here."

"It's impossible." Urahara took a step back.

"Actually, it is possible, because I am here. As you can see." He gestured to himself.

"But, you were a hollow. I saw it myself." Urahara walked up to Ichigo and looked at him as though he were waiting to see Ichigo suddenly turn into a regular hollow again. As though somewhere underneath the human-like figure there was a regular hollow lurking. But nothing happened.

"I still am."

"What do you want?" Urahara touched Ichigo's shoulder, trying to see if he felt like a human.

Ichigo took Urahara's hand off of his shoulder. "A gigai…like I said. I want to live in the real world again. So does my friend." He pointed to Nel.

"You escaped from Hueco Mundo, huh?" Urahara looked impressed, his hand up to his chin. "I see." He turned around. "Well, then. I'll have to get you gigai's, then."

"Thank you." Ichigo dusted off his shoulder now that Urahara wasn't looking.

An hour later Ichigo, Nel and Orihime left Urahara's shop with gigai's intact. Orihime had healed Ichigo while they were waiting for the gigais as well.

It was approaching night time and Orihime walked with Nel towards her apartment. It was decided that Nel would live with Orihime so she could protect her in case the Espada should come back to take her again.

Ichigo went to his house. Once it was night out he jumped up and went through his open window. When he got in he saw his dad, asleep, at the chair at his desk. He felt bad waking him. So, he laid down on his bed and fell asleep.

Before he knew it he was being woken up to the sound of a familiar voice. One he hadn't heard in what seemed like ages. "Ichigo? Ichigo, son?" He opened his eyes. His father was standing over him. "Ichigo."

His father was smiling at him. "Hey, dad." He sat up.

"It's really you. I'm not dreaming."

Ichigo stood up. "No, I'm really here." He smiled. "I came back."

"Ichigo!" Isshin hugged him, tightly. "I can't believe it!"

Ichigo hugged him back, awkwardly.

"What happened to you, son? Where have you been?"

Ichigo didn't know what to say. "I ran away. I…felt stifled. But I realized how silly it was. So I came back. I'm sorry." He smiled. He felt like it was a stupid excuse but he couldn't think up anything. He wished his dad could understand so that he could just tell him the truth. But there was no way he could.

Isshin watched his son. He could tell there was something going on. He would have to talk to Urahara later to see what had really happened.

"Your sisters will be very happy to see you, Ichigo." He hugged him again. "You don't even know how happy they'll be."

"Yes, well. It'll be nice to see them as well." Ichigo smiled.

"You smile a lot more than you used to, son."

"I do?" Ichigo thought about that. He guessed he did, but it wasn't the kind of smile people usually do. It was an evil kind of smile. The bad kind. He would have to stop that.

Isshin wanted so badly to just say. 'Where were you, really? Listen, I know you didn't just run away. Just tell me the truth.' But he couldn't. But he had to know. He just wanted to know now, he didn't want to wait to ask Urahara.

"Dad, I've been wondering something." Ichigo looked at his dad.

"What is it?"

"This might sound a little strange to you, but…you have a very high level of reiatsu. Like, Captain level reiatsu." He brought his hand up to his face. "Why is that? Once again, you might just look at me like I'm odd, but, after all of the strange stuff that I've gone through and after finding out that Chad had powers, I wouldn't be surprised if you were…well…a Shinigami."

Isshin was speechless. He didn't know what to say. He coughed to try to stall. Then he realized he would have to just say something. "Well, to tell you the truth." He paused. "I have _no_ idea what you're talking about I-chigo!" He kicked him in the gut.

"Ow!" Ichigo fell to the ground. He stood up. "Don't ever do that -" he reached his hand up to grab his katana from his back but there was nothing there. He realized he was in his gigai. Then he realized he was talking to his father and he probably shouldn't kill him. He sighed.

"You say the strangest things, boy." Isshin tried to ignore the fact that his son just tried to kill him and rubbed him on the head. "I'll just be go-"

"I know you're lying, dad. You _are_ a Shinigami. Just tell the truth. Now."

Isshin let out a breath. "Ichigo…why are you asking this?"

"Because I want to tell you where I've _really_ been."

That caught Isshin's attention. He sighed. "Yes. You're right. I'm a Shinigami."

"I knew it." "But, if you're a Shinigami, why are you here on-"

"Long painful story, don't want to talk about it, where have you been?" He crossed his arms in front of his chest.

Ichigo looked at the ground. "Hueco Mundo."

"What?" Isshin put his hand up to his ear. "It sounded like you just said Hueco Mundo, but I must have heard wrong."

"I'm a hollow. I've been living in Hueco Mundo." He stared at him. "I'm an Espada."

"What's that?" Isshin looked confused.

"Because of Aizen-sama using the Hogyoku he is able to create a hollow called the 'arrancar' which I am. Espada are just the top level of those hollow."

"So you're the best of the best?" Isshin smiled. "I'm proud of you, boy."

"Yes, but I'm evil. I've killed one of my best friends." He smiled. "And I don't even feel bad about it."

"That's not true." Isshin closed his eyes.

"I'm afraid it is."

"You feel bad about it because I know who you are, son. I know you wouldn't like to kill anyone, least of all someone you know. I know that you feel bad about it somewhere in your heart."

"That's where your logic is flawed. I have no heart."

"Yes you do." Isshin walked up to him. "It's right there." He pointed to his chest. "Even if it's not technically there, it is there. I can tell. Otherwise you would have never come back. You would have never come through that window. You wouldn't still be my son."

"I came through that window because I had to. Because I have nowhere else to go. I don't want to sleep on the streets, do I?" He smiled. "I'm not your son. I'm just someone who happens to be connected to you."

Isshin put his hand on Ichigo's shoulder. "It's good to have you back."

"What is wrong with you! How can you say things like that!" Ichigo moved his hand away. "I'm no longer human! I'm no longer really me! Don't you understand that? How can you still love someone who has lived in Hueco Mundo for so long? Who has killed people and eaten souls to stay alive? Who has done things that are so evil I can't even tell you about them? How can you stand there and tell me that it's good to have me here? That I'm still your son? I'm not! I'm a completely different person! Why don't you see that?"

Isshin sighed. "I know you're not exactly how you used to be, Ichigo. And I know you had to do things that weren't exactly human or good. But there's no way you can go back and change that. You can try to change the way your future is, however. You can try to make yourself better from here on out. You have a family that loves you and friends that wanted to rescue you from Hueco Mundo. You have a life that is waiting for you here. You have a chance to be as normal as you want to be. Don't waste that because you don't think you deserve it." Ichigo looked at the ground. "Enjoy what you have now, Ichigo. I'm very happy to have you back."

Ichigo closed his eyes. "Fine."

"Good." Isshin hugged him. Ichigo looked past him. "Are you ready to go see your sisters?"

"Yes. They won't be too emotional, will they?" Ichigo wasn't looking forward to to many hugs or crying or anything like that.

"I assume so." Isshin stepped back. "But it won't take too long, hopefully."

"Alright." Ichigo nodded. "I'm ready."

Isshin and Ichigo began walking down the stairs. Karin called out for Isshin. "Dad, we've been waiting for you, the food is getting cold."

"Sorry, girls. It's just that we have an honored person to add to the breakfast table this morning." They stood in front of the table.

Karin and Yuzu stared at Ichigo. Ichigo stared at them. He brought a hand up and waved at them. "Uh, hi." He wasn't good with emotions.

"Ichi-nii?" Karin stood up and walked to him. "Is that really you?" Tears welled up in her eyes. "It's…" She grabbed him. "I'm so glad to see you." She hugged him, tightly.

"Yeah." He tried to hug her back. "I'm glad to see you, too, Karin."

Yuzu pushed her chair out and ran to Ichigo, tears flowing from her eyes. "I can't believe it's you!" She jumped into the hug as well. "I love you so much and have missed you. I'm so happy you're back!" She wrapped her arms around him.

So many hugs. He was beside himself with awkwardness. Isshin noticed this.

"Alright, girls, I think it's time for breakfast." The girls moved back and sat down at the table.

Ichigo sat down as well. Yuzu was sill crying. "I can't…believe you're back." She wiped away tears.

Karin's shook her head. "It's so good to see you, Ichi-nii." She sniffed.

"Thanks." Ichigo put his hands on the table, awkwardly. So many emotions. He couldn't keep up. He tried to smile a convincing smile.

"Ichi-nii."

"Yes?"

"Who…is that man behind you?"

Ichigo's eyes widened. He turned around. When he did he saw someone he could have gone the rest of his life without seeing ever again.

"Hello, Ichigo." Ulquiorra stared at him. "Having a nice breakfast with your family?"

Ichigo pushed his chair out and stood. "What are you doing here?"

"I think the more appropriate question would be, 'What are _you_ doing here?' Ichigo." Ulquiorra stepped forward. "What, exactly, were you thinking when you took the human back to earth and went with her yourself?" He looked at Isshin. "You did realize how you put your family in danger when you went back to them like this, didn't you?"

Isshin tightened his hand into a fist. "Leave my family out of this. It's between me and Aizen-sama."

"Don't forget all of the Espada. It's between you and them as well." Ulquiorra looked to the window. "Where is the girl?"

"Why does that matter?"

"At her apartment, probably, am I correct?"

"She has protection; you won't be able to get to her." He waved a hand at him.

"Protection?" Ulquiorra stared at him. "Who would that be?"

"Why is that any of your business? I think you should just leave now and never find out."

"I'm afraid I can't do that." Ulquiorra looked to the ceiling as though he were examining this 'strange' place. "I have to get the girl back for Aizen-sama."

"I won't let you."

"If you help me obtain her, you can come back as well and you won't be punished. That's all you have to do." Ulquiorra held the hilt of his katana. "If you resist…"

"I _will_ resist." Ichigo stepped forward.

"Don't be ridiculous, Ichigo." Ulquiorra kept his hand on the hilt of his katana. "You've always considered me your friend. I know it. You'd never be able to fight me."

"Watch me." Ichigo's gigai fell to the floor and he took his katana off of his back. Yuzu took in a sharp breath as she saw her brother hit the ground. "If it was to save my family I'd do anything, even kill you."

"Even kill me, Stark, Aizen? What have you become, Ichigo?" Ulquiorra unsheathed his katana.

"There's nothing wrong with protecting your family." Ichigo took a step forward.

"What if that family saw what you really were?"

"My father knows what I am." Ichigo looked back to his father for a moment. "He doesn't mind.

"And your sisters? Have they seen your mask? Your hollow hole? Your resurreccion form? Do they know that you eat souls to stay alive? Do they know that you kill humans? Have they seen you covered in blood? Do they know what you really are?" Ulquiorra cut Ichigo's outfit on the front so it opened, showing his hollow hole and mask. "Why don't you turn around and show them?"

"And turn my back to you? I don't think so." Ichigo smiled.

"I'll walk around with you." He started walking around. "You'll want to watch me, anyways." He walked towards Karin.

"Stop." Ichigo put a hand out. "Why are you doing this? This serves no purpose"

"Afraid for them to see?" Ulquiorra stopped.

Ichigo closed his eyes. "Will you leave if I do it?"

"No." Ulquiorra appeared in back of Karin, his katana at her throat.

"Stop it!" Ichigo turned around, his hand outstretched to her. "Let her go!"

"So emotional." Ulquiorra dropped his katana. "So unlike you."

Karin was staring at Ichigo's hollow hole and mask. "Ichi-nii…what is that?"

Ichigo looked down to his mask. He brought his hand up to it. "It's…"

"It's the remains of his hollow mask." Ulquiorra put his hand on Karin's shoulder.

"Don't touch her." Ichigo spoke in a low tone.

"Hollow mask?" Karin looked at Ichigo. "What's a hollow?"

"They're evil creatures." Ulquiorra spoke to her. "They eat souls and humans to live." Ulquiorra took his hand off of her shoulder and walked around to where Ichigo was. "Ichigo and I are evolved forms of those creatures. That mask is what is left over of when he was a full form of a hollow."

Karin looked at Ichigo. "Evil?"

"Your brother isn't evil, Karin." Isshin put a hand out toward her.

"No, I really am." Ichigo shook his head.

"What's going on!?" Yuzu looked around from Isshin to Karin. She was holding up Ichigo's gigai's head in her lap.

"Your brother belongs in Hueco Mundo, where the rest of his kind live." Ulquiorra looked to Ichigo. "Living here makes no sense."

"No!" Karin stood up. Ulquiorra turned to her. "He belongs here! With us! He isn't evil. He may have done bad things when he was a hollow but he's not anymore, he's just Ichi-nii. So let him stay."

"What do you mean I belong in Hueco Mundo, why would I be able to come back I escaped?" Ichigo put a hand out so that Karin would know it was okay.

"Aizen-sama is a tolerant man. He knows that you were a human once and that you were friends with the human. If you come back he will forget about her and take you back as an Espada."

"What?" Ichigo looked at the ground. Then he looked back to Ulquiorra. "And my family, will you leave my family alone?"

Karin didn't like how this was sounding. "No, Ichi-nii, don't go!"

"Yes, we will leave your family alone. Just come back and everything will be left as it is." Ulquiorra sheathed his katana.

Ichigo looked to Yuzu and his father. "Fine."

"No, Ichi-nii!"

"I have to, Karin. For you and for my friends." He put his katana on his back and got back in his gigai. Yuzu got up. "I'm back, Yuzu."

"Onii-san." She hugged him.

"Alright." He turned to Ulquiorra. "Let's go." He looked at everyone. "I have to do this. Goodbye." After attempting to hug everyone he walked out with Ulquiorra. "May I say goodbye to my friend?"

"Yes."

When they got to Orihime's Ichigo knocked on the door. Nel opened it and shut it just as quickly when she saw Ulquiorra. Ichigo knocked again. "Nel, it's me, Ichigo, it's fine, open the door."

"Was that Neliel?" Ulquiorra looked at Ichigo.

"Yes." Ichigo looked at Ulquiorra as the door opened. "Hi." Ichigo walked in and Ulquiorra followed.

Orihime's eyes were wide as Ulquiorra stood next to Ichigo. Ichigo sighed. "I'm going back to Hueco Mundo."

Ulquiorra and Nel looked at each other for a moment before Nel nodded and Ulquiorra nodded once, back.

Orihime couldn't believe what Ichigo was saying. It made no sense. "But why!" Orihime looked sad. "Why can't you stay?"

"He's going so you that can stay." Ulquiorra said.

"But…no! I'll go back and you'll stay here. It's not fair!" She stood up.

"No, Orihime. You stay here. I'm used to being an Espada. You'd just be in a room by yourself. I'll go back."

She sat back down and looked at the ground. "No."

Nel hugged Ichigo. "I'm going to miss you."

"I'll miss you, too."

"It's time to leave." Ulquiorra created a portal for them to go.

"Goodbye." Ichigo stepped through the portal.

When they got there Aizen was waiting in the main hall. Ulquiorra brought Ichigo to him. "Ichigo." He smiled. "I'm so glad you've returned. I was worried about you." He stood and walked to him. "Please, don't scare me like that again. You are very important to me."

"I'm sorry, Aizen-sama." Ichigo bowed his head. "Please forgive me."

"Of course." Aizen walked back to his chair and sat down. "You'll need to get out of you gigai."

"I will."

"Thank you." He looked at Ulquiorra. "And thank you, Ulquiorra."

Ichigo turned around and started walking towards his room. Once he got out of his gigai he got into a new change of clothes and sat down on his couch. He let out a long breath. He hadn't had the time to take in the fact that he was back in Hueco Mundo. To tell the truth he hadn't really had the time to take in the fact that he was out of Hueco Mundo.

"Ichigo-sama." Aya leaned against the doorframe.

He looked up. "Oh, Aya." He looked at the ground.

"Why did you leave?" She walked up and sat on the ground in front of him. "Why?"

"I don't know." He closed his eyes.

She leaned her forehead against his knee. "Never leave again."

"I promise." He looked at the wall in front of him. "I will stay in Hueco Mundo for as long as I live."


	4. Chapter 4: Ichigo's Past

Orihime sat down at her table and buried her head in her arms as she rested them on the table's surface. "He'll be gone forever! I'll never see him again!" She started crying.

Nel leaned against a wall and looked out of the window. She sighed. It was true, Ichigo probably would be in Hueco Mundo for the rest of his life, now. He had given up his freedom for theirs. But…there had to be something that they could do. She bit her lower lip. Some way to make it so Ichigo could come back here and Aizen would forget about him in Hueco Mundo. But how? It would be impossible.

Orihime sat up and looked at Nel. "What are we going to do?"

"I don't know." Nel shook her head.

----

Ichigo took in a breath and let it out.

"Ichigo?" Ichigo opened his eyes. "Are you alright?" Aizen watched him from the front of the table.

"Yes. I'm fine." He smiled. Everyone stared at him. "I'm sorry."

The meeting ended and Ichigo walked out. Ulquiorra walked up to him. "You should at least pretend to pay attention when Aizen speaks…"

"Ulquiorra." Ichigo looked at him. This was the first time Ulquiorra had spoken to him since he had been brought back from the real world. "Oh, yeah." He looked at his hands. "I'm sorry."

"Yes." Ulquiorra looked away. "Just remember from now on."

"I will."

"Good." Ulquiorra stopped walking. "That's all."

"Do you hate me?" Ichigo asked.

"Hate?" Ulquiorra didn't understand the question.

"Dislike?" Ichigo tried to think of different ways to say it. "No longer think of me highly?" He looked at the ceiling. "You are angry at me…"

"I think I understand." Ulquiorra stopped him due to the fact that he was more annoyed than disliking him at the moment. "I do not dislike you. It is more of a…disappointed feeling."

"Oh, that's worse." Ichigo looked away.

"Just do not do something that reckless again." He walked away. "Ever. Or I'll have to kill you."

"Hey, listen." Ichigo walked up and stopped him, his hand on his shoulder. "You can't just go saying stuff like that."

"I can't?" Ulquiorra looked back.

"No. If it weren't for you I'd be back in the real world, happy, with my family."

"You, happy? I'd like to see that."

"_Shut up_."

"You don't belong with humans, you belong with hollows." Ulquiorra took Ichigo's hand off of his shoulder. "Living with them just asks for trouble. It wouldn't be too long before you ate one of them."

"I wouldn't eat one of my family members!" Ichigo took a step back.

"Then what would you do with them? Go on picnics? Play games? Sing songs?"

"People don't sing songs on a daily basis with their families." Ichigo shook his head. "You don't know anything about humans."

"Then what _would_ you do?" Ulquiorra faced him directly.

"I don't know…hang out." Ichigo looked at the ground.

"And what else would you do? Go to 'school?' Spend time with your friends?"

"I don't know! I'd want to do something better than hang around here going to stupid meetings, plotting how to kill every last human to find a way to take over the Soul Society I know that!" Ichigo raised his voice. A few arrancar around them looked over. He looked to them. "That's what I _would_ say…if I didn't believe in what Aizen-sama was doing." They walked away. "Listen, I'm tired of this place, I'm tired of Aizen and I'm tired of being a hollow. I want to just be normal for once. I want to not have to kill intruders I want to just…be!"

"How noble."

"I said 'shut up!'" Ichigo walked away.

----

Nel was leaning against the wall, thinking. What could they do? Finally, her eyes widened. "Orihime, I have it! I know what we can do!"

"Huh?" Orihime looked up at her, her eyes red. "We can do something?"

"We can save him." Nel smiled. "All we have to do is kill him."

"What?" Orihime looked at the table. "But…we have to what?" She turned to her. "That would be a bad thing, though. Right?"

"But you have to understand. We don't actually kill him, we just make it look like we kill him. So that they believe it. Then, when they believe he's dead we bring him back here." She clapped her hands together, once. "It's brilliant!"

Orihime smiled. "You really think it'll work?"

"I just said it was brilliant, that means it'll work, right?" Nel stood. "It's so simple. But not really. You see, we don't bury our dead in Las Noches. We just throw them out for the hollows to eat. So, I kill him, they throw him out, I go and get him, we come back here. We go into hiding for a month or so. Then, it's over. Actually…" She sat down. "Aizen's war will be starting pretty soon, so he'll just go into hiding while that's going on."

"Well, I like it. How will he know that he's going to be…'killed,' though?" Orihime asked.

"Well, I'll have to go there beforehand and tell him. I just hope no one is in his room or anything. I doubt there will be. He hated his fraccion and he never really had his friends in there. He wasn't really a sociable guy. I mean, we talked and everything, but since I'm not there." She gestured to herself, "Who is there to be there, right?" She smiled.

"So, when should we do it?" Orihime was eager for this to happen. She wanted Ichigo out of that place and to see him again.

"We have to set up a place to bring him to so he can hide. We definitely can't bring him here afterwards.

"That's easy, Urahara's."

"We have to go there and ask, then. Can we go now?" Nel smiled.

"Yes, let's go." Orihime stood and took Nel's hand. "Let's go!"

"Alright, alright." Nel stood. "Let's go."

-----

Urahara looked at Nel and Orihime. "So, you want to bring Kurosaki-san here after you save him…" Nel and Orihime nodded twice. "And you say that he may be injured or bleeding severely?" Nel and Orihime nodded again. "And there might be a risk of many people coming after him once he is here?" Nel and Orihime nodded. "And I might get brought into the situation causing injury and pain to myself…" Nel and Orihime nodded and shrugged. "So I'm really an idiot if I do this?" Nel and Orihime smiled. "Right, sounds good." Urahara brought his fan up to his face. "When will he be here?"

"As soon as we can get him, Urahara-san." Orihime nodded.

"Good. I'll just be here." He pointed to the inside of the shop.

"Thank you, Kisuke." Nel smiled and they started walking away.

"Wait." He put his hand out, stopping Nel. "You need to understand something before you go." He looked into her eyes. "It's about time."

When Orihime and Nel had walked away from Uraharas Nel turned to Orihime. "Orihime we're going to be changing our plans a little."

-----

Ichigo stood in his room, looking into his mirror. He was looking at the remains of his hollow mask, wondering what his family must have really been thinking when they saw it. What must they think of him right now? Did they still love him? Did they think he is a freak? That's what Ishida said. He said he was a freak when he saw his resurreccion form. What would his family think if they saw his resurreccion form?

Ichigo closed his eyes. Maybe he really was a freak.

He laughed. Why should he care anyways? He knew he wasn't a freak. He was ten times better than Ishida was and he didn't need to be in the real world. This was where he belonged. Humans, his family. He didn't need them. He wanted to live here, to kill, to eat souls. That's what he was made for. His hollow mask showed that. He should have killed Ishida.

"Ichigo?" Ichigo looked behind him. Nel was standing next to a portal that was closing. "Ichigo, I'm here to save you."

Ichigo's eyes were wide. "Nel…I…" After a moment he shook his head. "I don't need you to save me. I'm staying here. Go home."

"What? But don't you want to come home? Don't you want to be with your family?"

"No. I don't want to be with those people, I don't even know them. And I sure as hell don't want to be with Orihime. I don't even know her. She's whiny and needy and annoying as hell. I don't need someone like that around. I've realized that this is my home. So go away." Ichigo looked back at the mirror.

"You don't mean this, Ichigo. Stop telling yourself these lies!" Nel reached out for him.

"They aren't lies!" Ichigo looked back at her. "I hate humans! I hate the world of the living! I hate Orihime and my family! I hate everything that's tied to my past! So stop trying to remind me of it!"

"But…Ichigo." She walked up to him and put her hand on his shoulder. "Don't do this. I know you don't really feel this way."

"Go away, Nel." He pushed her away from him.

"Stop being like this!" She got out of her gigai and unsheathed her katana. He took his katana off of his back and blocked her attack. "You're angering me, Ichigo!"

"Why are you attacking me?"

"Because, you're angering me!" She attacked him again. "Come back, dammit!"

"No!"

"Yes!" She attacked him, again. "If you don't come back on your own I'll have to knock you unconscious and take you back against your will!"

"Like you could do that! I'd kill you before you could!" He cut her arm.

"You wouldn't!" She cut his arm.

"You don't believe me! We're not even really friends anymore, Nel. It's been so long. I'd kill you, believe me I would."

"How could you!" She hit him over the head. He fell to the ground.

"Ow!" He looked up at her. "Did you really think that would knock me out?"

"I was hoping." She shrugged.

He knocked her feet out from under her and she fell to the ground. "Dammit!" She thrust her katana forward and pierced his left shoulder. "Ha!" She pointed to the wound.

"A little immature, are we?" He pierced her right shoulder.

"You're being difficult! All you have to do is listen to my plan and you could come back and have a normal life!" She stood and cut the side of his face. She laughed. "Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to ruin your image."

"Dammit!" He brought a hand up to his face and brushed it across, healing it. "Ha, high speed regeneration."

"Who's immature now?" Nel cut his face again. "I can keep 'um coming."

"You won't leave until I hear your plan, will you?" He stabbed her in the arm.

"No!" She stabbed him in the leg.

"You're not going to listen to what I have to say, are you?" Nel stood up and took a few steps back.

Ichigo looked away. "I already told you, I have no desire to be in the real world again. That's final."

Nel shook her head. "You idiot."

"Shut up, Nel."

Nel sheathed her katana. "I'm coming back tomorrow. Think it over. If by then you still don't want to come home, I won't bother you anymore." She created a portal and started to step through it. "Goodbye, Ichigo." He didn't say goodbye in return. She turned away and left.

Ichigo looked annoyed. He brought his hand up to his forehead and closed his eyes. "Why would she come? I don't want to be human, I don't want to go back." He looked forward. "Dammit."

----

Ichigo stood on the edge of Las Noches. He looked out into the stark world that was Hueco Mundo. Nothing existed. Nothing truly lived. There was only death.

He jumped down off of the edge and landed at the base of the wall. He walked out towards the trees. There wasn't anyone there. It was quiet. Finally he was in a place where it was quiet. No Aya, no Aizen. Even no Ulquiorra or Stark. It was nice to just be by himself.

He kept walking out, away from Las Noches. Away from Aizen. After a while he looked back. It seemed just the same as it ever had been. As it had been when he had first arrived in Hueco Mundo. That day. He turned back to the white sand and open black skies. The day when he first saw this place. The day when he first saw Urahara's expression at seeing his hollow form. He could remember it as though it had happened only a moment ago. Ichigo closed his eyes. Then he looked down at his hand. It looked like a human's hand.

In the distance he saw a group of hollows gathered around something. His eyebrows pulled together and he quickly moved toward them. "What are you doing?" He tried to move them apart.

"Get away." The pushed him back. Ichigo pulled his katana off of his back and killed the hollow closest to him. Then, they all turned to him. "What the hell have you done, boy?" The hollow that seemed to be the leader began walking up to him.

Ichigo ran to him and sliced him down the center of his body, then killed the rest of the hollows. He looked at what they were gathered around. It was a soul. He stared at him for a moment. "What are you doing here?"

The soul looked terrified. "I…don't know. I don't know where I am! They just took me." He stood up. "Thank you. But why are you here, too?"

He put his katana on his back and looked around himself. "I live here."

"W…what?" The soul took a step backward.

Ichigo appeared in front of him and grabbed his neck. "Unfortunately for you."

----

Ichigo stood in the sand, staring at the pitch black sky. He brought his clawed hand up to his mask, his hair flowing in the wind. He couldn't speak. No words came out. Where was he? He looked down at his body, again. What had happened? Wasn't he supposed to have become a Shinigami? Did something go wrong? Urahara had said something about him either becoming either a Shinigami…or a Hollow. He must have failed.

----

Ichigo looked back to Las Noches. He didn't want to return. Nel would be coming back tomorrow and he would have to make a choice. Also, Ulquiorra was there. If he were to go back to the real world Ulquiorra wouldn't stop searching for him. How would it possibly work for him to go back? It wouldn't.

He walked up to a white tree and broke off a small branch.

"Hey, idiot."

Ichigo turned to the right. Grimmjow was standing there, watching him. "What the hell are you doing?"

Ichigo looked down to the tree branch in his hand. He dropped it on the ground. "What are you doing here, Grimmjow?"

"I'm getting you. 'You shouldn't be all the way out here, you could get hurt.' Or at least that's what Aizen says. So get the hell back to Las Noches." He turned around. "Now."

"I'm an Espada, I think I can handle regular hollows."

"Yeah, but what about Vasto Lordes?" Grimmjow looked back at him. "I could have kicked your ass even when I was a Vasto Lorde." He started walking back to Las Noches. "So come back."

Ichigo started walking back as well. "Fine."

"Wait a while, so you aren't following me." Grimmjow held a hand up.

"No. I'm just walking now." Ichigo kept walking.

----

Ichigo moved through the Menos Forest, his large black form shuffling through with the rest of the Menos. He knew he had to continue to evolve, to move forward. He continued to take the lives of his fellow Hollows. He didn't care. He just wanted to become greater than he was. He wanted to change. He realized that he wasn't himself anymore. He thought of how he was when he was a human, that he wasn't really Ichigo anymore. He tried to think of what his family would think of him if they were to know what he was. But he didn't care. He tried to push his former life away from him. He tried to create a new life, a new self. Cold, cruel, hollow.

----

Ichigo stopped in the middle of the sands and watched as Grimmjow walked ahead of him. He was tired of seeing him. He wanted him to go away. Grimmjow stopped and turned around. "What's wrong?"

"I'm tired of seeing you, what else?"

"Shut the hell up." Grimmjow turned around and kept walking.

Ichigo turned around and looked at the sky. The moon was shining. "Just like it used to."

----

"Ichigo." An Adjuchas walked next to Ichigo, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Ichigo, where are you going?"

"To Las Noches." Ichigo started walking towards the large fortress in the distance.

"You'll never make it in there. You'll have to be a Vasto Lorde, and you have to be handpicked." The Adjuchas stopped him. "Don't go."

Ichigo stopped. "You have to be a Vasto Lorde."

"Yes."

Ichigo grabbed the Adjuchas. "Then I guess I'll have to eat more hollows."

----

When Ichigo got back to Las Noches, he went to his room and laid down on his couch, hoping Aya wouldn't come in.

"Ichigo-sama?"

"Dammit," Ichigo whispered.

"Ichigo-sama, where have you been?" Aya sat down next to his couch and held his hand.

"You know I don't like it when you touch me, Aya." He pulled his hand away from her.

"But you need to be touched." She held his hand again.

"I disagree." He pulled it away, again.

"I disagree with you disagreeing. " She held it again.

"Dammit." He brought his other hand up to his face.

"See. It's not that difficult." She leaned her face against their hands.

"I don't understand you." He closed his eyes.

"But, Ichigo, don't you know that you're important to me?" She looked up at him.

"I know."

"I want to be with you." She leaned her face against their hands again.

"Too bad." He sighed. She was getting annoying. He was going to have to have this conversation again.

"Why not?" She looked up at him, she wasn't expecting this answer.

"We're not suited to each other." He let his hand fall from his face.

"What? No…" She looked very sad.

"Unfortunately, yes."

He tried to sit up, but she held steadfast to his hand. "Just sit with me a little while longer."

He let out a breath. "Fine." She leaned against his hand again and got closer to the couch. He looked awkward. "Listen, I'm really not used to this kind of thing."

"Shh…" She shook her head. "It's really fine."

"Eh…" He sighed and closed his eyes. "This is not fine."

"Ichigo, will you ever say 'yes' to a girl?" Aya asked.

"Probably not, no."

"Why not?" She opened her eyes.

"No one good enough for me."

"Jerk." She closed her eyes, again, and smiled.

"What?" He looked over to her.

"Nothing." She sighed, content.

----

Ichigo stood in front of Aizen, his new Vasto Lorde form only days old. Aizen stood for a moment before taking out the Hogyoku and showing it to him. The Espada were in the room, watching. Ichigo waited as Aizen awakened the Hogyoku and he was changed, nearly instantaneously, into an Arrancar.

Aizen smiled. "What is your name?"

Ichigo looked up at him as Nel put a blanket around him. "Ichigo."

"It's good to meet you, Ichigo."

Ichigo looked up at Nel to thank her, then just looked displeased at her smile. Nel looked a little disappointed that he wouldn't be kind to her. She walked back to where she had been standing.

"These are my Espada, Ichigo." Aizen named them to him, and introduced him to them. "You will fight with them.

Nel watched Ichigo for a few moments. Ichigo looked up at her and scowled. "What the hell are you looking at?"

Nnoitra laughed. Nel looked up at Aizen. "Aizen-sama, I'd like to have Ichigo as one of my fraccion."

Aizen looked to her. "You already have two loyal fraccion."

"There are Espada with many more," she pointed out.

"Very well." Aizen walked out of the room. "Consider yourself lucky, Ichigo."

Nel walked up to Ichigo. "You'll fight under me." She held her hand out to help him up. He slapped it away. She smiled. "It's nice to meet you."

---

After about ten minutes Aya left and Ichigo sat up. He had to think about Nel's proposition, no matter how difficult it may be. Would he go back to the world of the living? If he stayed here he would just have to deal with Aya, he supposed. And Grimmjow. Damn, he hated Grimmjow. And life here was starting to get boring. Ulquiorra seemed to dislike him now that he saved Orihime.

Ichigo looked up at the ceiling. "Maybe…"


	5. Chapter 5: Hatred

"Ichigo." Nel stood at the mouth of her door. Ichigo sat on her couch wearing a plain white outfit. "How do you like your new outfit?"

"I hate it." He looked forward.

"Good." She smiled. "Good…"

"Why did you pick me as your fraccion?" He looked up at her. "Can't you tell that I hate you?"

"Yes." She walked up and stood in front of him. "But I think that you probably hate everyone. So, I'm here to help you change that."

"There's no point in liking people." He looked away. "I only need to fight. Fight to get stronger."

"Sure, a lot of living in Las Noches is fighting." She sat down on the couch next to him. "But Dondochakka, Pesche and I like to spend time with each other as well. We care about each other." She turned to him. "There's no point in hating life. Enjoy being a hollow."

He slowly turned to her. "The only thing I enjoy about being a hollow is killing. I don't see the point in enjoying 'spending time' with other hollows unless that time is eating them."

Nel whistled. "Man, you've been alone for too long."

"I'm not going to call you Nel-sama."

"You don't have to." She put her hand on his shoulder. "Just plain 'Nel' is fine."

"Get your hand off of me."

"We should get you a better outfit. One that only you wear. That outfit is a standard one that every Arrancar wears if they don't wear their own." She stood up and looked at his outfit. "Yes. I can envision it now." She paused. He was looking out of the window. "What do you really want?"

"To be an Espada."

"Then you'll have to kill one of us." She leaned up against a wall. "But I don't think Aizen-sama would be too happy with that. So you'll have to wait for someone else to kill one of us."

----

Ichigo's eyes were closed as he sat on the ground at the foot of his couch. He was waiting for Nel. He knew she would be there at any moment, now. What would he say? He would have to listen to her plan first. He opened his eyes.

"Hi, Ichigo." Nel smiled. "I didn't want to disturb you." She sat down on the floor in front of him. "I've never seen you look that peaceful before."

"Leave me alone."

"What brought it on?" She was curious. He had always been so bent on fighting, on strength. He had never just paused before. But he had just looked so calm. Why?

"I was thinking. Remembering. I guess." He looked away. "Do you remember when I first got here?"

"Yes."

"What's your plan?" He turned back to her.

"I kill you."

"I don't like it." He looked down to the ground.

"At least I make it look like I kill you."

"That sounds a little better."

"You see, we have to find a way to make it so that everyone here forgets about you so that you can live in the real world. I figure a way to do that is to make them think that you're dead. So, I'll kill you."

"And where and when does this little act happen?" Ichigo stood up and laid down on his couch, staring at the ceiling.

"Where does it happen? Wherever you think the most people will see. Like…" she smiled, "one of Aizen's meetings?" She turned to the door. "Someone's coming. And I think it's a friend of yours. Just a second." She hid.

Ulquiorra opened the door. "There's going to be a meeting in a few minutes. Be there." He walked out.

Ichigo narrowed his eyes. "Okay. So how do you 'pretend' to kill me? And what do you do afterwards, I don't understand this?"

"O-kay." Nel turned around. "Well, I'll come into the meeting and wait for Aizen to enter the room."

----

"Ichigo, you seem to think that you're somehow better than everyone here." Nel clashed her katana against his. "You have to learn that you're only a numero. Until you've reached Espada level, even number zero, you can't say that. Do you understand?"

Ichigo pushed her back a few feet. "I don't have to have a number above yours to understand that I'm better than you." He moved forward and attacked her.

She blocked his attack and stabbed him in the shoulder. "You're not better than me."

"Maybe after I kill you I'll prove that I am!" He tried to attack her chest but was blocked and she stabbed him in the other shoulder.

"You shouldn't attack your superior, Ichigo. It's against protocol." Nel blocked another attack. "Why can't you get it through your head that I'm trying to help you! If you listen to me I can make you stronger than you are now. Isn't that what you're trying to do?"

Ichigo stopped. He looked away. "You'll help me get stronger?"

"Yes." Nel brought a hand up to her forehead. "I will."

----

Ichigo leaned his head against his hand, breathing in deeply. Aizen hadn't entered the room yet and he was tired. He didn't want to do this really. It was mostly Nel that had pushed him into this. Sure he kind of wanted to see his family and he knew it would make them and Orihime happy. But being in the real world would be difficult and painful. He didn't want to deal with all of those emotions. And Ishida…_why_ didn't he just kill Ishida. At the time it seemed like a good idea but now that he saw how he was he wished that he would have just done him in.

Aizen entered the room. Everyone looked to him. The meeting began. "Hello. Thank you for gathering here today. What we have been waiting for will now finally happen. We will invade Karakura Town." Ichigo smiled. Then he stopped. Wait. He shouldn't be happy about that. He was going to try to be on the other side of this, right? He looked at the table. When was Nel getting here, he wanted out so he didn't have to listen to this anymore. "We will be leaving in-"

"Ichigo." Aizen stopped talking. He looked to his left. Everyone looked to where he was looking. Ichigo was silent. "Look this way you bastard." He turned around. Nel was standing there with her katana drawn. "I'm going to kill you."

Ulquiorra stood and unsheathed his katana.

"No, wait." Ichigo put a hand out. "I'll deal with this." Ulquiorra looked to her and nodded, sitting down. Ichigo turned to her. "What are you doing here, Nel?"

"I'm here to kill you for what you did to Orihime!" She spoke loudly. "How could you, Ichigo?"

"What are you talking about?" He really didn't know what she was talking about. This wasn't part of the plan.

"You left her all alone when you came to this place. She loved you and you cared more about your status than her. Do you know what she's been going through? No, because you don't care! That's why you have to die!" She ran at him.

"Die?" He blocked her attack. "Nel, calm down!" He blocked another attack. "She's not worth it!"

"What!" She stabbed him through the arm. "How could you! Do you realize what you've done to her! You've always been like this!"

"Always been like what?" He stabbed her in the stomach. "I thought we were friends!"

"Not anymore!" She sliced him across the chest. "Not after I've seen what you can really do." She cut him across the face. He growled. She tried not to laugh. She straightened up. "Just as conceited as ever, eh, Ichigo?" She cut him on the face again. "Don't want that face of yours to get ruined? You always did think you were the best thing around here!"

Ichigo cut her face. She took in a quick breath. "Ha!" He pointed at her with his katana.

Stark watched them. "It's as though they're still friends."

Aizen spoke. "Just kill her."

Ichigo looked over to him. "Oh. Yes. I will." He turned to Nel and attacked her but she blocked and stabbed him through the stomach. Then she moved back and sliced him from his shoulder to the bottom of his stomach. He let out a breath and fell to the ground.

"You don't seem to be trying very hard, Ichigo." Stark spoke from his chair.

"Thanks." Ichigo coughed.

Nel looked down and held her katana by the hilt with both hands, plunging it through Ichigo's back. Ichigo grabbed it and tried to push it out but Nel kept it in and ripped it across his back down to the bottom of his chest. Ichigo's eyes widened. If Nel didn't stop she might actually kill him. He took the katana and pushed it out of his back and tried to stand. Nel kicked him to the ground. Ichigo chocked and lay there. The room darkened. He couldn't feel anything. Nel went a bit…too far. She walked over to him and stuck her katana through his neck.

After he was dead she looked up at everyone. "Goodbye." She disappeared.

----

"See, it's not that hard to smile." Nel messed up Ichigo's hair.

Ichigo turned to her. "I've asked you repeatedly not to touch my hair."

"Do you spend hours on it in the morning?" She moved her hair back.

"I don't like to be touched." He kept walking. They were making their way further from Las Noches.

"Then how about this!" Nel jumped on him. "A hug!"

"Nel!" Ichigo fell over.

"You need a hug!" She held onto him tightly. "Hollows need to be touched, even you. _Even_ Ulquiorra." She pointed at him.

"Have you ever hugged Ulquiorra?" Ichigo looked up at her.

"No." She shook her head. "_No_…"

"Please get off of me." He was still laying on the ground, her on top of him.

"Not until you hug me back."

He made a sound of annoyance. "I don't know…" He held his hands up to hug her, awkwardly.

"You can do it." She nodded.

"Fine." He hugged her.

"Aww, an Ichigo hug." She lay her head against his shoulder. "Thank you."

"Yes, now please get off of me."

She stood up and looked down at him. "You should practice emotions, Ichigo. You don't have enough of them."

"I have emotions." He stood and brushed himself off.

"Rage and hatred don't count." Nel brushed herself off as well. "I'm talking about pity, selflessness, happiness. Things like that." She put her hand on his shoulder. "And a little bit of friendship wouldn't hurt you, either."

"You're my friend." He turned around and kept walking.

Nel blinked. "What?" She took a moment before she started walking after him. "Did you just say that I was your friend? But I thought that you hated me."

"I don't hate you." He shrugged. I used to hate you. But not anymore."

"Then what do you think of me?"

"You're a strong fighter. You care about your fraccion. You'd probably give your life for them. I don't know if I'm included in that, but Pesche and Dondochakka, definitely. You're worthy of your rank." He looked at her.

"Wow." She looked down. "That's not what I thought you'd say."

"I'm not all hatred and rage."

----

Orihime stood over Ichigo's dead body. They were in Urahara's shop. Orihime's right hand was covering her mouth. "He's…dead."

"Yeah." Nel's arms were crossed in front of herself. "I killed him. But you already knew we were going to do that, why are you so frightened about it?"

"Well…I mean. He's _dead_."

"So bring him back to life." Nel pushed Orihime closer to Ichigo. "And you should probably hurry."

"Okay." Orihime started healing Ichigo. "Will he definitely come back to life?"

"I barely killed him. He'll be fine." Nel nodded.

"Alright." Orihime held her hands over the sphere. "Did he know you were going to kill him?"

"Of course not. He would have never consented. He thought we were just going to pretend."

"Nel-san!" Orihime turned to her. "How could you!"

"Would you rather he be in Hueco Mundo right now?"

Orihime looked at Ichigo. "His face is hurt."

Nel laughed. "That's what Ichigo would be worried about, too."

"Why?"

"Ichigo was very vain. I used to make fun of him because of it." Nel smiled and shook her head slowly in remembrance. "He was great."

Orihime turned to look at Ichigo. "He wasn't that way when he was here."

"Really? It must have just been after he became a hollow." She looked at Orihime. "He probably would have gone for a girl like you, you know, because you're so cute."

Orihime blushed. "What?"

"Oh, he's moving." Nel pointed to Ichigo.

Ichigo grimaced, slightly, and turned his face to the side. He brought a hand up to his face and opened his eyes. "Nel?" He looked over to see Nel and Orihime.

Orihime smiled. "Hi, Kurosaki-kun."

"I _told_ you not to call me that, dammit." He pounded his fist on the ground.

Nel put her hand on Orihime's shoulder. "But then again, maybe not."

Orihime tried to smile. "Ichigo-kun, how are you?"

"I'm feeling better. At least I'm not _dead _anymore!" He looked at Nel.

Nel smiled and leaned forward. "Yeah, at least there's that."

"You'll be completely better, soon." Orihime continued to heal him.

"Is my gigai here?" Ichigo looked around. "I can't really get around without that damn thing."

"Are you in a bad mood, Kurosaki-kun?" Nel smiled at him.

"I'm going to stab you through the head."

"I'll take that as a 'yes.'" Nel grinned.

"It'll just be a few minutes." Orihime nervously held her hands over the light.

"I told Orihime that you two should get together." Nel pointed at Orihime.

"Nel-san!" Orihime looked at Nel.

Nel looked at Orihime. "What?"

Ichigo looked up at the ceiling. "Probably not."

Orihime looked at him, sadly. She whispered, "Why not?"

"We're not suited to each other."

"Ichigo, you're such an ass." Nel shook her head.

"Huh?" Orihime looked to Nel. "Why?"

"That's what he says…I mean." Nel stood. "I'm going to go get something to drink."

When Nel was gone Orihime slowly looked to Ichigo. She bit her lower lip. "You…really don't like me, do you?"

He sighed. "What does that matter?"

"Why did you save me, then?"

"Because Nel asked me to." He closed his eyes.

"I can't believe that." Orihime looked at the ground. "I know you must think of me as your friend. You talked to me all that time when you were looking after me. We got to know each other again. I know you don't dislike me."

"You're right. We're best friends. I'd love to hang out with you every night. We could watch movies and go out to the park." He looked back up at the ceiling.

"I don't think that much. I'd just like to…talk to you." She sighed. "You know?"

"No. I don't." He closed his eyes. "Sorry."

Orihime looked to the side. "What's your favorite color?"

"Huh?" He turned to her. "What'd you just ask me?"

"I said…what's your favorite color? I'm…trying to get to know you. I assume…you've changed since you became a holl-"

"Black. _Pitch_ black."

"You're lying, right?" She looked at the ground. "You don't have to keep up a wall just because of what you are. You can be yourself."

He sighed. "I don't have a favorite color."

"Why not?" She turned to him.

"No reason to."

"When I think of you, I think of the color green." She smiled.

"Not orange?"

"I'm not stupid! I wouldn't go straight to your hair color." She quickly covered her mouth.

He laughed. "I see. That's good."

She smiled a little. "I don't know why. I just think green is calming. And you seem calming to me."

"Right." He rolled his eyes. "Calming. That's why you're afraid of me."

"I'm not afraid of you." She looked away.

"Yes you are. It's written all over you. You're terrified of me. Admit it." He pointed to her face.

"I'm not…terrified of you. You're just…intimidating."

"I work very hard to intimidate you. It's good to see that it's paid off." He smiled.

"Kurosaki-kun, how could you!" She sat forward.

"Dammit, don't call me that!"

"Kurosaki-kun, Kurosaki-kun, Kurosaki-kun!" She closed her eyes.

"Stop it!" He sat up, then yelled out in pain and laid down.

"Oh, are you alright?" Orihime brought a hand out to him. "You probably shouldn't do that." She laughed a little. "It'll be a little bit before you're completely healed."

"Thanks." He sighed and closed his eyes.

Orihime thought for a moment. "Ichigo-kun. What was the first thing you remember…after you became a hollow?"

He opened his eyes, slowly. "Why do you care?"

"Because, I care about you."

"No you don't. You care about me when I was a human. I'm no longer a human, I'm a completely different per-"

"You're still Ichigo-kun. So I still care."

He looked at her. "I saw Urahara-san. He dropped his fan on the ground. I remember thinking it was a strange reaction, because I thought that nothing was wrong. Then I realized…" Ichigo looked up at the ceiling. "They tried to catch me, probably to kill me. But I ran away. I got to Hueco Mundo."

"Urahara-san tried to kill you?" Orihime looked sad.

"I think he was going to, yes. So I ran. That's why I wasn't all that happy to come here, actually. Though, I suppose from his point of view I wouldn't have exactly been someone to keep around. He probably should have killed me from a Shinigami's perspective."

"But, he was your friend!" Orihime shook her head.

"Not anymore, he wasn't. I was immediately the enemy." He closed his eyes. "And I technically still am. He has no reason to be helping me like he is right now. And neither do you. I should be on the streets. My kind should have killed me for saving you and your kind should have killed me for being what I am."

"No." Orihime moved forward and stepped through her Shun Shun Rika.

"Can you do that?"

"You're not the enemy." She laid down next to Ichigo and held him. "And you don't deserve to die. Don't say things like that."

Ichigo looked over to her. He didn't like being close to people like this. "Hey…could you-"

"You don't have to tell yourself things like that, it'll just make you feel bad." After a few seconds she realized what she had done and that she was lying next to Ichigo, holding him. She took in a breath. "Kurosaki-kun!"

"…Dammit!"

"I mean, Ichigo-kun!"

"What?"

"You're too close to me!"

"So move away from me!"

She quickly stepped out of the sphere and turned around, blushing. Then she turned around after thinking for a moment. "Ichigo-kun. Why don't you want me to call you 'Kurosaki-kun?'"

"Because no one calls me that anymore."

"I don't think that's the real reason."

"What?"

"I don't think that's the real reason."

"_What_?"

"Tell me the real reason."

He brought his hand up to his face and let out a breath. "I…don't like things that remind me of when I was a human." He let his hand drop. "When you call me that, I remember what it was like to hear you call me that when I was a human. It bothers me."

"How?" She turned around.

"I don't want to talk about this." He turned on his side so he wasn't facing her, but it hurt him to do so, so he turned back so he was looking at the ceiling.

"Is it that it sounds nice to hear it…so it bothers you, because you don't want to hear something that makes you feel good like that?"

"Idiot. Of course not." He turned to her. "Why in the hell would something that _you_ had to say make me feel good?"

"Sounds like you were right." Nel stood in the doorway holding a glass of half-drunken water. "I never would have thought that Ichigo would have emotions like that hidden inside."

"I just said-" Ichigo raised his hands.

"Yes, and your words told all." Nel took a drink.

"Ichigo-kun, how much do you remember from your human life?" Orihime held her hands out to the sphere.

"Only that I loved you." Ichigo leaned towards Orihime.

"Ichigo, don't be a jerk." Nel pointed at him.

Orihime looked away. "You seem to remember your friends and family…do you remember other things?"

"Like what?" He closed his eyes. "My favorite color?" He laughed.

"I don't know…" She turned to the ground. "Did you?…l…ove…"

He looked at her. "Huh?"

Nel gave Orihime her glass of water. "Drink this."

Orihime took the glass quickly and drank it down. "You know, things like what you learned at school. Stuff like that."

"Oh. Yeah, sure."

"Ichigo's a phenomenon." Nel pointed at Ichigo. "Most of us don't remember much about our former life, however because he became a hollow in such a strange way I think he was able to keep his memory pretty much intact."

"Oh." Orihime held the glass, looking into it.

"And no, I don't remember if I loved you." Ichigo looked at the ceiling.

"Eh?" Orihime sat, still.

"Well, then!" Nel took the glass from Orihime. "This has been fun, but Orihime and I should probably get back to her apartment, I'm sure that Ulquiorra will probably be there by now."

"But I'm not healed yet!" Ichigo put a hand out as the sphere disappeared.

"Regenerate yourself!" Nel waved her hand at him. "Unless…" She turned around. "You're just using Orihime's talents at healing as an excuse to see her." She smiled.

"Leave." Ichigo turned around.

"We'll talk to you later." Nel and Orihime walked out.

On the way home Orihime looked over to Nel. "Does he really dislike me that much?"

"Ichigo doesn't like anyone but himself. He doesn't even like me and I'm his friend." She sighed.

"Did he ever…date anyone when he was in Hueco Mundo?" Orihime looked down at her hands.

"Are you kidding?" She laughed. Then she looked at Orihime. "No, really, are you kidding?"

"No, I really want to know." She watched Nel for the answer.

"Well, he didn't really think there was a reason to date anyone. He thought he was above it, I think."

"Did anyone want to date him?" Orihime watched the road in front of her.

"Yeah, of course. He would get a few girls a week. He'd say 'we're not suited to each other' then laugh about it to me after…wards." Nel narrowed her eyes. "But he really meant that. He always wanted to make the girl really feel as though he could have-"

"I know he didn't want to be with me, Nel-san. You don't have to make me feel better about it." Orihime looked away. "He wouldn't have wanted to when he was a human, either."

"He really is stupid, though. You wouldn't want to be with a stupid guy like that. Other than fighting he's really worthless. He can't hold down a conversation and he's useless at cooking. Plus the fact that he makes you feel terrible all the time. Oh, and he's horrible with emotions. He wouldn't be able to hug you your whole life. Then theirs the aspect of children, he'd rather die than have them, and if you did, they'd just want to eat each other. Then there's the whole thing of you never knowing if he's going to kill you or not." She put her hand on Orihime's shoulder. "See? I've given you many good reasons not to be with Ichigo."

Orihime smiled. "Thanks." She held her hand up to the setting sun. "I guess I'm still hoping that somewhere in there Kurosaki-kun is waiting for me. That somehow he'll wake up and say my name."

"That will never happen." Nel shook her head. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah." Orihime nodded. "I…think you're right."

When they walked up to Orihime's apartment Nel turned to Orihime. "He's in there." Orihime nodded. Nel opened the door. "Hello, Ulquiorra."

Ulquiorra looked to them. "Where were you?"

"Is that any of your concern?" Orihime walked up to him. "I think I should be asking why you're inside of my apartment." She walked to the door and pointed to the outside. "Please leave!"

"Is he still alive?" Ulquiorra spoke to Nel, obviously ignoring Orihime.

"If he was alive, how could he have died in Las Noches?" Nel sat down.

"How could who have died in Las Noches?" Orihime looked at Nel.

Nel closed her eyes. "Anyways. Please leave."

Ulquiorra watched Nel. "I don't believe you."

"How could who have died!" Orihime walked up to Nel. "Who died?"

Ulquiorra turned to Orihime. "Kurosaki Ichigo."

"What?" Orihime stared at Ulquiorra. "No. No, he can't be dead." She shook her head. "It's not true." She turned to Nel. "Is he telling the truth?"

Nel closed her eyes and looked away from her. "Yes."

"Nel! Why?!"

"Because I killed him." Nel stood and looked out of the window.

"NO!" Orihime ran to her and shook her. "Why!"

"Because of what he did to you!" Nel turned to her. "He ruined you!"

"No…" Orihime fell to the ground. "No…" She started crying.

Nel wasn't looking at her.

Ulquiorra watched Orihime. "Where were you just now?"

"I just told you, it's none of your business!" Orihime looked up at him, angry. "Go away!"

Ulquiorra stared at Nel for a while before he looked back down to Orihime who had begun to cry again. He waited for a moment before looking back to Nel. He disappeared.

Orihime cried for a moment longer before she quieted down. She stood and opened her front door and looked around. No one was there. She turned back and they waited for a few moments. "He's gone." She dried her eyes. "How did I do?"

"I didn't think humans could cry so much." Nel smiled. "Good job, I think he'll leave us alone for a while."

"Awhile? Why won't he just leave us alone forever?" Orihime looked disappointed.

"Because this is Ulquiorra we're talking about. He won't be satisfied just by this. He'll probably come back in a little while to check again. Luckily Aizen's war will be starting in a few days and everything will end, so it won't inconvenience us for too long."

"That's good." Orihime sat down at her table and looked down at it. "I wish…Kurosaki-kun and I could just be friends."

"Ichigo changed quite a bit when I became his friend." Nel sat down next to Orihime. "When he first met him he wouldn't talk to anyone, really. He was _very_ cold and cruel. That's why I chose him as one of my fraccion. I wanted to help him. So, slowly, he changed." She smiled. "However it seems…that he's gone back to his old self after meeting his human friends again." She laughed, once. "It's strange, isn't it?"

"Because of me he's cruel, again?" Orihime looked sad. "It can't be." She looked at the ground. "Why?"

"It's him, not you." Nel put her hand on Orihime's shoulder. "Don't blame yourself."

"Maybe…I shouldn't see him anymore. I obviously bother him."

"That's not it, I'm sure he wants to see you."

"No." Orihime closed her eyes. "I won't see him anymore. You go alone to see him." She stood and began walking to the kitchen. "It's almost time to go to bed."


	6. Chapter 6: Soul Society

Ichigo slowly woke up, his eyes straining in the light that he wasn't used to. He looked over and saw someone standing next to him.

"Kurosaki-san! You're awake!" Urahara sat down on a mat.

"Who the hell are-" Ichigo looked at him for a moment. "Oh, it's you."

"Yes." Uraraha waited for a moment before shutting his fan and resting it on his knee. "It is."

"Kisuke, are you going to introduce me to this boy?" Yoruichi walked over and sat next to Urahara.

"Oh," Urahara turned to Yoruichi. "Yes, this is Kurosaki-san. Kurosaki-san, this is Yoruichi-san." He turned to Ichigo. "I-uh." Ichigo sat up and leaned towards Yoruichi. Urahara laughed a little. "I know it's a little strange that she's a-"

Ichigo picked up Yoruichi by the neck and held her in front of himself. "It looks like a cat, but I know there has to be a voice box in there somewhere." He turned her from side to side. Yoruichi flailed her legs around, trying to get a footing. Ichigo held her up above his head, holding her sides with his hands. "She looks real, but it can't be true. I mean, it's a cat."

"I'm not fake!" Yoruichi bit him.

"Ow!" Ichigo dropped her. "What was that for?"

"Insolent fool." Yoruichi walked over and sat next to Urahara again. "I am much stronger than you are and you think I'm made up of spare parts?"

"Stronger than me?" Ichigo smiled wide and pointed to himself. "I'd like to see that."

"No, you really wouldn't." Urahara shook his head. "Let's talk about something else."

"Why is there a talking cat in the room?" Ichigo pointed to Yoruichi. "Good subject."

"I can talk because I'm not really a cat. Is that spoken in simple enough terms for you?" Yoruichi took a step forward.

Ichigo moved his hand forward, slowly, and pushed on the side of Yoruichi's head so she fell over. "Yes."

"Idiot!" Yoruichi stood up.

"Now, you two." Urahara put his hands between them. "Calm down."

"I want to see what you really look like, neko-san." Ichigo patted Yoruichi on the head.

"Don't call me neko-san, call me Yoruichi-sama." Yoruichi looked away.

"Like hell" Ichigo took his hand back. "Alright. Just show me what you look like, Yoruichi."

Yoruichi closed her eyes. "Very well." Slowly, she turned into her human form.

After a few moments of staring Ichigo looked up. "You're naked."

Yoruichi sighed. "Yes."

"Why are you naked?"

Yoruichi brought a hand up to her forehead. "Was I wearing any clothing when I was a cat?"

Ichigo looked annoyed. "Put some damn clothes on, neko-san."

"I told you…" Yoruichi sat forward. "Nevermind." She stood and left.

"Hey." Nel walked in. "I let myself in." She walked over and sat next to Ichigo. "How are you feeling?"

Ichigo looked to her. "Where's Orihime?"

"Why do you care?"

"Where is she?"

"She didn't want to come because she thought that she was bothering you." Nel raised her eyebrows. "Are you happy, now?"

Ichigo looked at the ground. "Go get her."

Nel turned her ear towards him and got a bit closer. "What? I don't think I heard that right."

"I want her here, alright. So go get her!"

Nel put her hands up. "Alright." She stood. "Just be happy I'm doing this while Ulquiorra's still looking for you." She walked out of the room.

Urahara was staring at Ichigo. "Any…particular reason why you want her here so badly?"

"It's only common sense. If she's left alone she could be captured again." Ichigo sighed.

"But, didn't they say they didn't want her anymore, and that they just wanted you?" Yoruichi had come back, fully clothed by now.

"Can I get something to drink?" Ichigo turned to Yoruichi.

"You want me to get it?" Yoruichi pointed to herself.

"Tessai-san!" Urahara looked back. "Could you get Kurosaki-san some tea?"

"Call me Ichigo." Ichigo looked to where Urahara had been looking.

Urahara turned to him. "Pardon?"

"Ichigo. I'd rather you didn't call me 'Kurosaki-san.' Just call me Ichigo."

Urahara brought his fan up to his face. "Very well, Ichigo-san."

After a moment, tea was placed in front of each of them and Ichigo took a drink. "Thanks." They talked for a while before Orihime and Nel walked through the door and into the room. They said hello and Orihime nervously sat down far away from Ichigo. Ichigo spoke harshly. "Sit here." He pointed next to himself. "I know you want to."

"Oh…okay." She sat down. Nel smiled and sat down next to Orihime. Tea was brought out for them and everyone sat silent for a while.

Orihime turned to Ichigo. She smiled a little. "Are you feeling any better?" She was happy that Ichigo had wanted her here, but his greeting had made her go back to thinking he didn't like her again. She was confused as to his opinion of her.

"Yes." Ichigo turned to her. "Thank you for healing me."

Orihime smiled. "You're welcome."

Urahara turned to Nel. "It's time." He took a drink of tea.

Nel looked down. "Is it?"

"What is? Time for what?" Orihime turned to Nel, then to Urahara.

"In two hours Karakura Town will be taken to the Soul Society. If you want to be taken there, but know that you are being taken, you should come with me. You can bring your family, Ichigo-san, and Ishida-san as well." Urahara took a drink of his tea. "I would get them now."

"I can't go out. Not with Ulquiorra out there." Ichigo looked toward the outside of the shop.

"I'll get them." Yoruichi stood.

Orihime looked to Ichigo. "We'll get Ishida-kun." She and Nel stood and they all walked out of the store.

----

Yoruichi walked up to the Ichigo's house and rang the doorbell. The door opened and Isshin smiled. Yoruichi smiled back. "Urahara called and let you know, I assume."

Isshin turned around. Karin and Yuzu stood behind him with their bags packed. "Let's go, girls."

----

Ichigo shook his head. "I don't like this. How am I supposed to get on in the Soul Society, I'm a hollow."

Urahara waved his hand. "You'll be with us. No big deal."

"Right." Ichigo looked away.

"They'll be too busy dealing with other things to notice." Urahara took a drink of his tea. "And if they ask, I'll just explain that you're a friend."

"And what about murdering a Captain?" Ichigo sat forward.

"You murdered a Captain?"

Ichigo closed his eyes. "I don't understand how this is going to work."

"If they ask about the Captain, just say that an Espada killed him. No big deal." Urahara's speech slowed down a bit as he looked up to see Ishida standing in the room, looking at Ichigo.

Ichigo looked up at him. He smiled. "Hey, Ishida." He toasted his tea at him. "Still want to kill me?"

"Kurosaki." Ishida stared at him. "You haven't changed."

"Why would I change?" Ichigo shrugged. "But, seriously, though. I'd like to be your friend." He looked sincere. "Ishida, let's be friends."

Ishida watched him for a moment. "You want to be friends?" Ichigo nodded. Ishida looked to Nel and Orihime. Both of them, especially Orihime, looked happy about this possible development. Ishida looked away. "Fine, I'll be your friend."

Ichigo smiled. "Thank you…friend." He took the last drink of his tea, lifting the cup upside down to get the last drop.

"Ichigo, are you sorry at all for what you did?" Ishida's eyes washed over with pain. All he wanted was Ichigo to apologize for what he had done to Chad, to be sorry for one moment for killing someone that used to be his friend, someone who was a friend to all of them.

Ichigo's face was empty. He looked down at his tea cup and didn't speak. Finally he looked at Urahara. "I need more tea."

"Nel, is he sorry for what he did?" Ishida turned to Nel. "I need to really know, once and for all."

Nel walked over to Ichigo and put her hand on his head. "Sorry?" She smiled, comfortingly. "He is." She looked down. "Just like I told you in Hueco Mundo, Ichigo is sorry for what happened to your friend. You don't have to worry about that."

Ishida closed his eyes. He wished he could have just heard it from Ichigo himself, but that would never happen, would it? And he would never know if what Nel said was really true. But for now, this would have to do. "Alright." He sat down. "When are we leaving?"

"As soon as Isshin-san and his family get here." Urahara looked towards the door. "Which seems to be right now." He smiled.

"Hey, son." Isshin, Karin and Yuzu stood at the door. Karin and Isshin smiled at him. Yuzu was looking around. "Onii-san? Where's onii-san?"

Ichigo made a noise of frustration. "Where's my damn gigai?"

"Just a moment." Urahara stood and left the room.

When he came back Yuzu gasped and ran to Ichigo. "Onii-san!" She hugged him. "I've missed you!"

"Yeah. I've missed you too." Ichigo patted her on the shoulder.

"How have you been, son?" Isshin walked up and put his arm around Ichigo's shoulder. Ichigo moved away a bit. Isshin dropped his arm. "Have you been well?"

"I was pretty beaten up in Hueco Mundo. By someone…" he looked at Nel, "but I got better." He still hadn't quite forgiven Nel for that one, yet. Nel smiled at him.

"That's good." Isshin patted him on the back.

"It's time to go." Urahara opened the door to the underground room. "We'd better hurry." They all made their way down the stairs and towards the senkai gate that would take them to the Soul Society for the time that Aizen's war would take over fake Karakura Town. Hopefully, it wouldn't be that long.

----

Ichigo looked around him. "This…" He turned to Urahara. "Is like one huge slap in the face." He pointed to him. "Do you realize where we _are_."

"Yes!" Uraraha brought his fan up to his face. "One of the nicest manors in the Soul Society." They were sitting in Byuakuya Kuchiki's manor. "We were very lucky to get it. But they said since we had so many in our party, and since it wasn't really being used right now and that we were helping the Soul Society like this, we could stay here. Nice, huh!"

"Not occupied!" Ichigo sat forward. "Do you know why it's not occupied! Because _they_ killed off the younger one and_ I_ killed off the older one!"

"Ichigo-san, it's better not to say things like that out loud and so loud in a place like this." Urahara put his fan in front of Ichigo's face. "It's common sense."

Ichigo sat back and crossed his arms in front of himself. "I can't believe I'm even here. A hollow in the Soul Society. It's ridiculous." He grumbled to himself. This just wasn't right. He knew something bad was going to happen. They would catch him, kill him, do experiments on him.

"Like I said, don't worry." Urahara motioned for him to calm down. "You're _fine_. Probably." He said the last part, quietly.

"That's it!" Ichigo stood up. "I can't stand this anymore." He turned to Urahara. "You said this manor has a senkai gate. Let me use it, I'm going back to the real world."

Urahara stared at him. "What?"

----

Ichigo arrived on the edge of Aizen's battlefield. He looked from side to side. It seemed as though no fighting was going on yet. What was going on? "Where is Aizen?" He could feel his reiatsu, but it was covered in flames away from the rest of the Espada and their fraccion. He turned to the Espada.

"Ichigo?" Ichigo looked to the voice. Stark was staring at him. "Why are you here? Why are you alive?"

Ichigo stared at him for a moment before going to him. He didn't speak for a moment. "I faked my death."

"I can see that." Stark looked to the Shinigami. "We're about to destroy the Soul Society. If you want to live you should join us again."

Ichigo turned to look at the Shinigami as well. He said nothing.

"You belong on this side, Ichigo." Stark wasn't looking at him. "You belong with Aizen. Fight with us."

Ichigo looked away. "Where is Ulquiorra?"

"He's in Hueco Mundo." Stark continued to watch the Captains. "Aizen told him to watch Las Noches for him."

Ichigo looked up. He moved his eyes across the Shinigami. "Who's fighting who?"

"You can have whomever you wish."


	7. Chapter 7: Ichigo's Battle

Hey, everybody! Just in case you were wondering, the aspect of death that Ichigo embodies is 'hatred,' as far as Espada's go.

----

Ichigo and Stark waited on the side of the battle. Everyone was just standing there, watching Baragan's four fraccion fight Ikkaku, Madarame, Kira and Hisage. It seemed as though they would all wait until those battles were over. Ichigo looked over to a battle. Just as it seemed to end he saw what seemed to be the Shinigami's Head Captain speak to the rest of them. "Get them!" Everything became quiet but the sound of his voice. The Espada stood, still. "We must risk our lives to defeat them here! Do not let them pass even if the flesh is torn from your bones!" Ichigo couldn't hear the last that he said.

He didn't look at Stark. "Tch. He really thinks they can win."

"You seem so quick to turn sides, Ichigo. First ours, then theirs, now ours again." He looked annoyed. "You know, I changed my mind." He pointed to Captain Hitsugaya. "You're fighting that guy."

"That kid!" Ichigo pointed to him. "He's as small as Lilinette!"

"Shut up!" Lilinette jumped kicked Ichigo in the back, throwing him to the ground. "I'm not small!"

"Dammit, yes you are!" Ichigo stood. He looked to Hitsugaya. "Fine. I'll fight him." He disappeared.

Stark heard someone talking from behind him. "That kid." He looked over to see Captain Ukitake and Captain Kyoraku standing behind him. "Can you…send her somewhere else?"

Matsumoto stood behind her Captain, readying for the battle. "I'll take these, you take the Espada."

"Alright." Hitsugaya agreed. "I'll leave them to you." He turned to the side to see Ichigo appear.

Ichigo stood in front of Hitsugaya. He sighed. He couldn't believe he actually got stuck with this person. And he was actually a Captain. He looked at his haori again just to make sure. This was ridiculous, why did Stark do this to him? He paused. No, he couldn't think this way. He shouldn't underestimate him. Ichigo had been standing there, thinking about all the ways he was angry at Stark, then how he shouldn't underestimate this kid for a while when Hitsugaya took a step forward.

"Excuse me?"

Ichigo looked up. "_What?"_ He crossed his arms, annoyed.

"Is something the matter?" Hitsugaya looked equally annoyed.

Ichigo closed his eyes. "What's your name?"

"Tenth Division Captain Hitsugaya Toshiro."

"Kurosaki Ichigo."

"You weren't here when all of the Arrancar arrived." Hitsugaya looked over the battles that were going on. "Are you an Espada?"

Ichigo took his katana off of his back. "Why? Will you only fight Espada?" He flew forward and attacked Hitsugaya, who unsheathed his katana and countered in time to stop the blade. "You won't stoop to fighting fraccion?"

"That's not it." Hitsugaya pushed Ichigo away from himself.

"If it'll make you feel better."Ichigo looked at Hitsugaya for a moment. "Yes, I'm an Espada." He appeared in front of him and slashed the top of his chest. Ichigo moved back and looked at Hitsugaya. "Slay-"

Before he could finish, Nel appeared in front of him and pushed his katana downward. "Ichigo, no." She stared him in the eyes. "No."

"What are you doing here, Nel?" Ichigo brought his katana away from her.

"You shouldn't be fighting them, you should be in the Soul Society with us. I don't know what you're thinking right now. Come back." She took him by the wrist and started moving him away from the battle. "Now."

"Nel, no! I'm in the middle of a battle!" Ichigo looked toward Hitsugaya, who looked quite confused. "Let me go, dammit!"

"Ichigo." Nel turned to him.

"What?" He looked at her.

She stared at him for a moment before she grabbed him around the waist and disappeared. They appeared in a park not too far from there. Nel dropped Ichigo on the ground and landed next to him. She turned and looked to him. "What were you thinking?"

"What were _you_ thinking? Why did you just take me away from a battle?" Ichigo stood and walked up to her. "I don't care what you have to say to me, I'm going back right now." He turned around and began walking back.

Nel appeared in front of him and drew her katana, blocking him. "You're staying. I won't have you ruin your life for Aizen. You won't fight for him any longer."

"Get out of my way, Nel." Ichigo tried to walk around her.

"No!" She attacked him. He took his katana off of his back and blocked. "Come with me!"

"I warn you, I wasn't kidding when I said I would kill you, Nel. I _will_ kill you. Don't get into a fight with me thinking I'll just give up in the end." He pushed her away from himself.

"I expected nothing less." Nel's face was quiet. "Not from this Ichigo. The Ichigo who first came to me. The Ichigo who couldn't even smile." She looked down. "Maybe if I were talking to the Ichigo I really knew. The Ichigo I grew to talk to. Then I would be able to reason with you." She shook her head. "However." She looked up to him and raised her katana. "_However_…" She turned her katana to the side and held it in her palms. "It seems we are on equal footing, now. So I will have to fight you as such. I won't hold back anymore, Ichigo." She spoke calmly. "Declare, Gamuza."

Ichigo took a step back as a light surrounded Nel. "Dammit." He didn't expect her to do that. He thought she wouldn't want to fight like this. That she wouldn't want to hurt him. He held his katana out. "Slay, Zangetsu."

When the light dissipated Nel stood in front of Ichigo, both of them in resurreccion forms. Nel's face was sad, "I see the day has come to fight you in your resurreccion form, and not to just witness it."

"Same goes for you." Ichigo smiled.

"You're so happy to kill a friend?" Nel's face was serious. "You really are just like you used to be."

"The truth is, I never changed. You just didn't know it." Ichigo swung his katana at her shoulder and she clashed his katana downwards.

She thrust her lance at his chest and he moved to the side, cutting her arm. She pushed his blade away from herself. "You think you're so evil." Ichigo attacked her, she stopped his blade and pressed her lance against it. "So inhuman." She pushed him away. "So horrible." She stepped back. "You're not!"

Ichigo laughed and stood still. "You just got done saying I couldn't be reasoned with because I went back to being that Ichigo I used to be." He smiled. "I assume it was that evil, horrible, inhuman version of me, yes?"

"Ichigo, listen to me!" Nel held her lance tightly in her hand. "You're not who you think you are! Stop trying to be who they told you to be. Stop trying to be who you _think_ you should be. Just be who you-" Nel gasped as Ichigo drove his katana through her stomach.

"I've had about enough of your speech." Ichigo pulled his katana out of Nel. "Just fight." He turned around and began walking away from her.

Nel stared at him. "Ichigo…what happened to you?"

He stopped. "Happened?" His arm dropped, loosely, to his side. "Nothing happened." He turned to look at her. "Nothing needed to happen. I'm a hollow, this is how I am."

Nel gestured to herself, slowly, with one hand and held her wound with her other. "I'm a hollow, and it's not how I am."

Ichigo's expression dropped. "Then you're a poor excuse for a hollow." He appeared in front of her and attacked. She blocked in time. "At least you can still fight after all this time, Neliel."

"Don't call me that." Nel reared up and kicked him away. "Stop this!"

"Why!" Ichigo attacked again. "There's no reason for you to care about what happens to me!"

Nel grabbed his katana to stop him. "You're my fracccion, and my friend! Of course you matter to me!" She kept hold of his katana. "And you matter to other people as well. Your father and sisters are worried sick, Orihime asked me to come here, personally. People care about you, Ichigo. Don't you understand that!" She pulled his katana from him and threw both of their weapons on the ground far away from them. She stared at him. "I don't want to hurt you, Ichigo." She leaned over and wrapped her arms around him. "Can't you see that you're important to other people?" Ichigo stood still in Nel's arms. Everything around them was quiet. Nel hoped that this would be the end of their fight. That Ichigo would return to the Soul Society with her. But after a few moments he disappeared, took his katana, appeared in front of Nel and pointed the tip of his katana at her neck.

Nel stared at him. "I haven't forgotten, you know." She looked down at his blade. "This was your signature way of killing. You killed nearly every one of your victims by cutting their throats. That's why I killed you that way in Hueco Mundo." She looked back to him. "Do you still do it?"

"You really think I can somehow 'change' from the person I am?" Ichigo moved his katana forward. Nel moved her head backwards in reaction. "You think I can be happier? It would never happen." Nel looked over to her lance with her eyes, only. "I could never be happy." He brought his katana back. "So…"

"Ichigo, catch." Nel stared at him.

Ichigo looked confused. "Catch…what?"

Nel disappeared, picked up her lance and held it steady, "Lanzador Verde." She shot it at him.

Ichigo whispered, "Dammit." He held his katana up. Then he realized he didn't want to break it, it was smaller now and couldn't withstand her attack he brought it back and was hit in the stomach. He was thrown to the ground.

Nel walked up and stood over him. Ichigo coughed. "You warned me that you wouldn't hesitate to kill me. Did you stop to think that I wouldn't hesitate to kill you? I've done it before."

Ichigo laughed. "Only to bring me back to life again, no doubt."

"Dammit, Ichigo, I'm trying to save your life!" Nel stepped on his leg. Ichigo yelled and looked up. "Why won't you listen to me!"

Ichigo slowly turned back to Nel, panting. He shook his head a little. "Useless. It's useless to try to save my life."

"Because you decided so?" Nel took her lance out of Ichigo and kicked him. "Because you think you're unworthy to be happy in life!" She kicked him, again. "Because you're too 'evil!'" She kicked him away from herself. Ichigo lay on the ground. He didn't move. He was looking at the world away from Nel. He was trying to think. Think. What was Nel trying to say? That life could actually be normal for him? How could it even. How could someone like him even have a normal family? How could something like that happen. He tried. He went to his house and tried to have a normal breakfast with his family and it didn't work. It just didn't work.

"I don't see…" Nel watched him as he spoke. "How I could ever get on in the human world." He sat up, but wasn't facing her. "I tried. But I failed. In the end, I just ended up going back to what I knew. I couldn't face it. It's better for me."

"You can't expect yourself to know how to do everything right away." Nel shook her head. "You have to give yourself time, Ichigo."

"Time?" Ichigo turned his head back a bit to look at her. "Time." He laughed a bit under his breath. "Yeah. That'll change everything."

"We'll all wait for you to get used to your surroundings." Nel held her lance loosely at her side. "We won't pressure you to be anybody you aren't."

"Sure." Ichigo brought his hand up to his forehead. He ran his hand through his hair. "I just attacked a Shinigami Captain, Nel." Ichigo closed his eyes. "They're not going to overlook that."

"Yes." Nel looked serious. "That's why we're not going back to the Soul Society."

Ichigo looked up to her. "What?"

"We're not going back to the Soul Society. Your father gave me money so we could get somewhere to stay until the war ended. They're going to tell us when we can come home." Nel looked down to her lance. "Are we still going to fight?"

Ichigo held his katana up. "Where?"

"A town nearby." Nel set a tip of her lance on the ground. "It won't take too long to get there if we use sonido.

"We're walking?!" Ichigo turned to her. "No way! Let's get a tax…no one's here to do that." He sighed and his resurreccion form disappeared. "Fine." He looked around. "Which way is the town?"

"In that direction!" Urahara began walking out from behind a tree on the edge of the park they were in. "But first, you'll need gigai's." He stopped in front of them. "Here you are." He set them in their hands.

"What's this?" Ichigo looked at it. "It's pretty small."

"Portable gigai." Urahara took Nel's. "You just-" He blew hers up, "and it's there!"

"Oh." Ichigo blew his gigai up. "Euw." He got into it. "Thanks."

"Kisuke, do you have the money?" Nel put her hand out. Urahara set a wallet in her hand. "Thanks." Nel looked at Ichigo. "This is the money your dad is giving us. It should last us a few days. He said you'd know what we could do with it." Urahara gave her a cell phone. "And they'll be calling us, too."

"Well…we should go." Ichigo started walking away.

"It's this way, Ichigo-san!" Urahara pointed to his right. "This way."

"Right." Ichigo turned around and he and Nel began walking in the direction Urahara had pointed. After a while Ichigo grumbled. "How far is it?" He started running. "This better not take all day!"

"Your father said the town was only thirty minutes away if you drove in a car, so if we start using sonido right now, it shouldn't take us too long, really." Nel disappeared.

"I…okay." Ichigo disappeared.

When they arrived in the town Ichigo looked around. "I've been here before. I have no idea where anything is."

"This way." Nel pointed in front of her. "I have a good feeling." After about twenty minutes they found a hotel. Ichigo paid for a room and they laid down on their beds, looking at the ceiling. "Aren't you glad we're not dead, Ichigo?" Nel smiled and looked over to him.

"Yes." Ichigo spoke in a dead pan voice. "Why not?"

"How long do you think this war will last?" She looked back up at the ceiling.

"Who knows?" Ichigo turned over on his side. "Hopefully not very long."

"Well, until then." Nel sat up. "What should we do?"

"Fight?"

"No…"

Ichigo sighed. "Listen, I'm kind of tired, okay. I'm going to rest." He closed his eyes. "Don't bother me."

"Ichigo, you're so dull." Nel stood up. "I'm going to go look at the city." She left the room.

Ichigo continued to lie on his side as the door shut. He was looking out of the large window that was on the outer wall of the hotel room. He sighed. This was ridiculous. He was actually trying this again. Nel had talked him into it somehow. Just when he was about to kill her. But he couldn't do it. He closed his eyes. Why couldn't he do it? He turned on his back and looked at the ceiling. No matter what Nel was still his friend. He closed his eyes.

"Ichigo? Ichigo!" Nel put her hands on Ichigo's shoulders. "Ichigo, wake up!" She shook him. He opened his eyes. "Ichigo, we won!" She was holding the cell phone in her hand.

Ichigo lay there for a moment before realizing what she said. He sat up, quickly, and put a hand on her shoulder. "We won! Wait…who is 'we?'"

"The Soul Society." Nel stepped away and talked on the cell phone.

Ichigo brought his hand up to his forehead. "The Soul Society won." He laughed. Then he stopped. "Stark."

"Ichigo, your father is going to come and pick us up at this hotel. He'll be here in…a half an hour. What's wrong?" Nel sat down on the bed next to him. "Is everything okay?"

"Yes." Ichigo stood up. "He'll be here in a half an hour?"

"Yes." Nel and Ichigo waited for his father in silence. Nel could tell there was something wrong but that Ichigo didn't want to say anything, so she just didn't ask. She laid down on her bed and curled up with a pillow.

"Hey, Nel." Ichigo was sitting in the chair that was placed in the room by the window. "Thanks for not killing me."

Nel looked up at him. "You're welcome." She smiled, slightly surprised. He looked over to her and smiled. She smiled more. "Ichigo, you know that's the first time I've ever seen you really smile."

He laughed. "I smile all the time."

She looked down at her pillow. "But it's not the type of smile that you smile back at." Ichigo's smile dropped. "I wish you would smile like this more often." She closed her eyes. "Ichigo, what's the one thing you like most about yourself?"

Ichigo's eyebrows pulled together. "_What_?"

"What do you admire most about yourself?"

He let out a breath. After a moment he sighed. "Nothing, really."

Nel looked at him. "You mean to tell me that all this time you acted as though you thought the world of yourself when really you don't like yourself at all?" She looked towards the window. "How lonely."

"I don't need to hear this from you, Nel." Ichigo covered his face with his hand.

"I like your courage." Nel brought a hand up to the top of her chest. "And your strength." She pointed to him. "And most of all, I like your humanity."

Ichigo's eyes widened. "What?"

"Even if you don't realize it, you do things to help those around you. By saving Ishida, by being with your family, by not killing me, twice. Even if your cruel to Orihime, you're kind to her as well, even if you don't notice it. You have more humanity than you know, Ichigo."

Ichigo looked to the floor. "Huh…"

Nel's cell phone rang. She opened it. "It's your father." She answered the phone. After a moment she hung up. "He's here." They walked out of the room and down the stairs.

When they got home his father took Nel home and both Isshin and Ichigo went back to their house. When they got there Yuzu and Karin hugged him and then Ichigo went up to his room. He looked around. It felt so strange to be back in this place again. After a few moments he looked over to the closet. He walked over and opened it up. Inside was Rukia's bed. He put his hand on it and spoke softly, "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you."

"Sometimes I don't need you to protect me." Ichigo looked to his right. Rukia was holding the corner of his wall, staring at him. She smiled. "Hi, Ichigo."

"Rukia!" Ichigo looked at her. "What are you doing here. How can you be here?"

"Your father told me you were still alive. So I had to come and see you." Rukia walked up to him.

"But, how are you still alive?" Ichigo put his hands on her shoulders. "You're supposed to be dead!"

"Nii-sama saved me." She looked down. "I was surprised, but happy."

"Byuakuya…saved you?" Ichigo realized what he had done. "So…"

"And now…" Rukia looked up. "He's dead."

Ichigo thought about this. He really thought about this. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? This could be bad. He paused. "Rukia…I am so sorry. That must have been painful." He patted her shoulder.

"Ichigo, you ass!" Rukia pushed his hand away. "I know it was you! Your father told me!"

"Dad!" Ichigo took a step back.

"Ichigo, you will understand, from the depths of my soul, just how painful it has been for me to lose my only brother." She pulled out her chappy dispenser and popped a pill.

"Whoa." He put his hands up. "Rukia."

When she was in her Shinigami form she unsheathed her katana. "Prepare yourself!"

"Rukia, calm down, we're friends!" Ichigo moved back, more. "I'm sorry about Byuakuya, really! I only killed him because I thought he killed you! It was revenge!"

She attacked him and he dodged, getting out of his gigai. He took his katana off of his back and blocked her next attack. "Dammit, Rukia, stop this." He looked her in the eyes. "I don't want to fight you."

"Unfortunately, I do." She kicked him in the stomach, crashing him through his window and out into the open air. He coughed as she flew forward towards him. "Rukia, stop!" He clashed her katana away from him. She cut his arm. "Stop it!" She slashed his chest. "St-" She stabbed him in the stomach.

"Why won't you fight back!" She moved back and looked at him. "Stop defending and attack me!"

"I won't hurt you." He stood still. "I can't."

Rukia's eyes had no emotion. "Then die."

"Rukia!" Rukia ran to him with her katana pointed at his chest. Just as she was about to hit him Isshin stopped her blade. Rukia looked up at him. "Kurosaki-san?"

"Rukia. Stop this." He pointed her blade downward. "My son feels badly for what he did now that he knows you are alive. He would never want to hurt you. He won't even hurt you now. Don't kill my only son, please."

Rukia looked angry. She looked past Isshin to Ichigo. After a moment she sheathed her katana and turned around. "Ichigo… are you truly sorry for what you did to nii-sama?"

Ichigo looked at the ground. "Yes."

Rukia closed her eyes. "It's good to see you again, Ichigo."

Ichigo looked at her. "It's good to see you again, too, Rukia."


	8. Chapter 8: New Life

Hey! I've been getting more alerts on this story lately so I was thinking that I might add more chapters. Plus the fact that this has got to be the fanfiction I have had the most fun writing hands down. So! I hope I'm not boring you all to tears. If I am, don't tell me. If I'm not, please tell me!

----

Rukia had resumed living in Ichigo's closet and he was trying to get used to the fact that he was living in a house with three humans and a Shinigami. He would do this…and kill none of them….every day. Rukia would pass him every morning and try to be civil, smiling slightly and speaking on occasion. He would try to smile as well, their interactions brief and to the point. When they got to the breakfast table the girls would watch them with interest.

Everyone in the house knew that Rukia slept in the same room with Ichigo and yet no one seemed to talk about it. The only person it bothered was Yuzu but she had promised to say nothing about it. Ever since the occurrence with Ulquiorra that morning and their short stint at the Soul Society she had gotten a bit used to the fact that strange things would happen, but she still couldn't quite swallow this.

After having a piece of toast and some water Ichigo walked out of the door with Rukia and down the street. Neither of them talked. Finally Ichigo spoke, quietly. "How long is it going to be before we start acting like we used to act?"

"We weren't very good friends before."

"At least it was better than this." Ichigo looked away from her. "I've told you repeatedly I'm sorry and I never apologize for anything. Ever."

"I feel special." Her sarcastic tone stung.

He rolled his eyes and let out a breath, not sure what to do. "Listen, I don't know exactly what to say to make this better."

"That's because you can't make this better," she explained.

"We're living in the same room, we have to get along better than this, Rukia." He looked to her. "Please."

She closed her eyes for a moment and stopped walking. He stopped and stood in front of her. "Get down on your knees and say you're sorry." She pointed to the ground.

"Holy shit, Rukia. What the hell do you think I am, what if someone sees?" He looked around them.

"Do it!" she commanded. "Or we'll be talking like this for the rest of our lives."

"Dammit, Rukia, why are you so difficult?" He closed his eyes for a moment. "Do you…realize…what you…" he paused. "Don't tell Nel." He slowly got down on his knees and apologized.

Rukia's eyes went soft. "I forgive you, Ichigo." She held her hand out to the top of his head. "Nel said you would never do this."

"Dammit!"

"Thank you." She helped him up. "I won't tell her."

He sighed, looking away. "Let's get to school."

When they were walking Rukia smiled. "Kon's been really quiet lately, I think it's from being alone for so long."

"He barely ever talks," Ichigo agreed, "it's wonderful." He thought for a moment. "What did he do while we were gone?"

"Your sister Yuzu kept him because she didn't want him to be alone in your room." She smiled. "Your sisters are really nice. They put up with me being in your house, especially Yuzu, I know she doesn't like it."

"Yeah, Yuzu's a good sport," Ichigo nodded. "I think she's waiting for something bad to happen."

Rukia raised an eyebrow. "Something bad?"

Ichigo's eyes widened. "Nothing. I just meant…nothing."

"What _did_ you mean?"

"We're almost to school," Ichigo changed the subject.

"You know you've been doing alright at school," Rukia allowed it. "You don't show your horrible hollow self that much."

"Thanks," Ichigo tried to appreciate that.

"I'm lying," Rukia sighed. "The only person you're ever nice to is me, Ichigo. What is your problem?"

"I'm sorry, it's just the way I am." He held a hand up to his bag. "I can't change."

"Not true. You totally begged in front of me a few minutes ago." She snickered.

"I did…not…I…_dammit_." He closed his eyes and brought a hand up to his mouth and a few more profanities slipped out of his lips.

"You _can_ change, Ichigo. I know you can." Rukia looked to him. "You just have to try."

"Try," he laughed. "You sound like Nel."

"I'm serious," Rukia opened the front door to the school and they both walked in.

"Ichigo-kun!" Ichigo heard a happy voice and turned to the side to see Orihime waving and running towards him.

Rukia whispered out of the side of her mouth, "here's your big chance."

"Ichigo-kun, how are you?" Orihime let out a few big breaths. "I can't find Nel-san."

"Fine," Ichigo answered civily. "I don't know where she is."

"Kuchiki-san, how are you this morning?" Orihime smiled to Rukia.

"Good, Inoue." Rukia smiled back.

"Let's go," Ichigo began walking away.

"Goodbye Kuro-Ichigo-kun!" Orihime waved to him as he walked away.

"Wave back," Rukia commanded.

"Like hell," he responded.

"Orihime." Nel stood beside Orihime and she jumped. "Was that Ichigo?"

"Yes. I almost accidentally called him Kurosaki-kun again. It was a near death experience." Orihime grimaced slightly.

"It gets worse every time, doesn't it?" Nel sighed.

"It's better at school because he can't attack me in front of a class full of students." She smiled, hopefully.

"I'll talk to him," Nel promised. She thought for a moment. "Have you ever considered hitting him with Tsubaki?"

Shock crossed Orihime's face. "I could never!"

"It would keep him in line to do so every once and a while," Nel suggested. Though, she thought, Tsubaki would never make it out of the experience alive. They walked down the hall to their class.

When Orihime walked in Ichigo was sitting at his desk, looking peaceful. She was surprised. She had never seen him like that before. Why did he look so…calm? She decided now was her chance. She nodded to Nel who seemed to know what the nod meant somehow and walked to Ichigo, standing in front of him with arms wrapped tightly around her books.

"Ichigo-kun," she began, "how are you?"

"You already asked me that," he pointed out severely.

"Ichigo-kun," she began again, "it would make me happy if I could…" she wandered off at the end as she saw him raise an eyebrow. She blushed. "If I could…"

"What?" He smiled.

"Nothing," she walked away.

He caught her arm and brought her back. "You can ask," he spoke in a beautiful tone, "I'll _never_ be angry with you."

"Liar," her heart skipped a beat. The truth was she just didn't remember what she wanted to ask anymore. It was the way he was talking to her and his expressions. It was how he was acting. He was either like a warm summer's day or like hard sand paper. She never knew which it would be. She gulped and flitted her eyes to Nel.

"Am I making you nervous?" He held her hand.

"I have to go!" She ran away.

"Why do you have to be so mean to her?" Nel stood over him. "You can tell the girl is positively in love with you, so why do you mess with her like that?"

"Because it's fun," he looked down to his notebook. "I don't get to have much fun around here anymore."

"We could spar," Nel offered. "Doesn't Kisuke's shop have an underground room?"

Ichigo seemed interested in that. "Yes, that sounds nice."

"Today after school, then," she walked away and sat down next to Orihime. After a few moments she spoke quietly. "What did you want to ask him?"

"He seemed so peaceful, so I was going to ask him if I could call him Kurosaki-kun. People seem to find it weird that I'm calling him by his first name, or so I was going to say," she whispered.

"Hate to tell you, but that will never happen." Nel turned back to the front of the room.

Ichigo tapped his finger on the top of his notebook as the teacher droned on in his mind. So boring, he thought. Why did school have to be so boring? Was it always this boring? Did they know who he was, what he was? Did they know that he could kill them all within a few seconds? This was ridiculous. He sighed and looked out of the window.

At least he could fight with Nel today, he thought. That would be a nice change of pace. He found himself getting into more and more fights with bullies at school because he was just so angry all the time. They seemed to flock to him, and he didn't mind. It was just that the fighting wasn't too fair. He wanted to fight with someone who could actually fight back and last for a few minutes.

"Kurosaki?" Ichigo heard the teacher call his name suddenly and he looked up. He blinked, showing he had no idea what the answer was. The teacher sighed. "Try to pay attention when I talk, Kurosaki." He looked to Orihime. "Inoue?"

Orihime stopped looking at the back of Ichigo's head. "What?" She shook her head. Ichigo looked back to her and she blushed. "I don't know," she whispered.

"Does anyone know?" The teacher sounded exasperated.

Rukia raised her hand. "The Pythagorean Theorem, sensei."

"Thank you, Kuchiki." The teacher looked back to the board.

Ichigo looked back ahead of him and thought for a moment. Maybe it was a good idea to stop messing with Orihime. She was getting worse every day.

When class was over Ichigo walked back to Orihime and she let out a small high pitched noise, grabbing her books and standing.

"Wait, Orihime," he held a hand out to stop her. Her eyes were wide. She waited for him to speak. "How are you doing today?"

She waited for a minute. "Fine," she answered, surprised. He hadn't asked her that since getting back from Hueco Mundo. She wasn't sure if he had asked her since he had become a hollow at all.

"Listen," he turned to Nel. "Nel and I are going to be sparring at Urahara's after school today. Do you want to come as well?"

Orihime smiled. "Yeah."

Rukia heard. "I better be coming, too."

"Then we'll all meet there," Nel announced. "Sounds good." She stood and they all left the classroom.

Ichigo left last, taking his books into his hands. He had actually invited someone to do something. He had been nice. Rukia was right, he just had to try. He laughed a little. Ridiculous.


	9. Chapter 9: The End

The underground room of Urahara's Shoten was bustling with high reiatsu beings. There was loud talking and a few curse words coming from the mouth of one irritated orange haired shinigami. The dust from the ground had been kicked up from their presence and was presently beginning to settle.

Rukia was the first to make her move as she took out her Chappy dispenser and popped a familiar candy shaped pill. In too short of a time she had separated from her gigai and Chappy had taken over her all-together unworkable temporary form. Once Chappy regained control of the body she took full responsibility to attack the seemingly idle Ichigo in his nonchalant stance against a rock in the corner. He didn't even know what had hit him.

"Hello!" She grabbed his head and smacked it against the ground.

"Dammit!" Ichigo barely made out before she pushed him down again. "What the hell are you?"

"Ichigo, what are you doing?" Rukia asked as she looked to him. She looked as though he were slightly disturbing to her, though he didn't really matter to her either way.

"What is on me? It's like Kon, but you." He was pushed down again.

"It's Chappy," Rukia corrected him. "It's what I wanted to get for you but Urahara got the wrong thing," she sighed.

"You mean you wanted this thing to be inside of my body?" Ichigo looked up to Chappy as she laughed manically.

"Yes," she looked to Chappy. "Chappy, let him up." Chappy looked to Rukia for a moment before nodding once and standing. Ichigo growled and stood. Rukia unsheathed her katana and looked to it for a moment before speaking the words that she had spoken so many times before, "Mai, Sode no Shirayuki." Her zanpakuto changed to a beautiful pure white. A white ribbon grew from the end. The most beautiful ice based zanpakuto in the Soul Society.

Orihime watched Ichigo as he glanced to Chappy once more suspiciously. She merely waved with one hand and giggled. Orihime sighed sadly, then shook her head slightly. She had to think about practicing right now. This was sparring, she couldn't spend her time moping. She held her hands up to her hairpins and spoke with purpose, "Tsubaki!"

Tsubaki appeared and looked to her. "What woman?"

"We're going to spar, Tsubaki."

"Count me in." He nodded.

Nel looked to Orihime as Tsubaki flew beside her. She wondered what it would be like to have such an interesting power. Such a power that it would cause her to be captured by Aizen. She looked down to her zanpakuto. She began to wonder if she was ordinary having such a thing as a zanpakuto. She unsheathed her zanpakuto and looked to it.

"What's wrong?" Ichigo walked to Nel. "You look worried."

"Do you think I'm ordinary?" Nel turned to him suddenly. She had a look of concern on her face. She had never seemed this way to him before. She had always tried to stay strong in front of him, a leader.

"Ordinary?" Ichigo thought about it for a moment. "No, I don't think you are. You were the tres espada. That automatically makes you special. You're an amazing fighter."

"Are you trying to say something about yourself here?" Nel smiled knowingly.

"I'm serious," Ichigo ignored her. "You don't have to worry about being ordinary, you've set yourself apart." He wasn't sure where this was coming from but he wanted to snuff it out. Maybe she was starting to feel this way because she had been away from Hueco Mundo for so long but he didn't want her to feel this way for some reason.

Nel looked down to her zanpakuto. She held it up a bit. "Special," she repeated his word. "Thanks."

"It's true," he repeated.

Ichigo walked away from Nel and looked down to Kon who was sitting down on a rock. Kon stared at him. "I don't want to do this," he said in an annoyed voice.

"Well I'm sure as hell not getting one of those Chappy things," Ichigo pointed to Chappy who was still smiling at him from a rock. She was sitting cross legged and putting her hair in pigtails.

"Fine!" Kon spoke in a high pitched tone. "Pull my soul from my body all you like!" He opened his mouth and Ichigo shoved his hand down Kon's throat as soon as his sentence was over. When he had the pill in his hand he made a soft sound of disgust then swallowed it. Soon his gigai separated from his hollow form and Kon was in his gigai.

Kon pointed at him. "I was expecting you to give me a few more moments of notice!" he spoke angrily.

"Don't complain," Ichigo took his katana off of his back and began walking towards the group. When he walked up everyone had their weapons ready.

As they were talking Urahara walked towards the group. "This is certainly unusual. Um…who let you in here?"

Everyone ignored his second question and smiled. Nel spoke. "We haven't gotten to practice in a while and Ichigo wanted to stab something."

Ichigo smiled.

"Then I take that as my cue to leave," Urahara turned around.

"Who fights who?" Rukia asked. Everyone was silent for a moment as they considered her question. Finally someone broke the silence.

"Orihime fights Ichigo," Nel said, matter-of-factly. "I've always wanted to spar with you, Rukia. Now's my chance." Orihime's eyes were wide as she looked at Zangetsu, glinting black and silver under the lights of the large underground room. She grabbed a hold of Nel's arm. Nel smiled. "Let's go." She walked away with Rukia.

Ichigo walked away a few feet and turned back around. "I don't think I've even seen your powers. That's…Tsubaki?"

Orihime nodded. She wasn't sure by the tone of Ichigo's voice if he was truly interested in her powers or not. She wished she could tell. Tsubaki's arms were crossed as he looked to Ichigo. "Who's this joker?"

"Tsubaki!" Orihime whispered, "This is Kurosaki-kun," she whispered lower, "don't hurt him."

"Then why are we sparring!" Tsubaki turned back to her and flew over, grabbing her hair, pulling it up, high so she cried out, "Honestly, woman, where is your-"

Ichigo was over to them in a heartbeat, tearing him away from Orihime without hurting her. Tsubaki struggled and yelled a bit then was shook and looked Ichigo in the eyes. "_Not_ good to do something like that to someone you're supposed to be protecting _is_ it?" He spoke carefully.

Tsubaki's eyes were wide for a moment. Then he shook his head a bit. "No." Ichigo let Tsubaki go and he continued to fly then went back to Orihime and whispered into her ear as Ichigo walked away. "He's scary; I thought he was supposed to be nice."

Orihime laughed, nervously. "Yeah…it's a long story." She was surprised by Ichigo. She wasn't sure what to think of him anymore. He was frightening, though she was glad that he would come to her rescue. She just didn't like the sight of him like that.

"So, fairy. You're supposed to protect her?" Ichigo talked loudly, as if Tsubaki couldn't hear because he was so small.

"I can hear you jerk!" Tsubaki shook his hand at him. "And yes!"

"Then kill me." Ichigo held his arms out, leaving his chest wide open.

"Ichigo-kun!" Orihime held a hand up to her mouth. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. What was he doing?

"Let me kill him," Tsubaki crouched down, ready to spring.

"I couldn't!" Orihime looked to Tsubaki.

"You have to use some real killing intent, woman!" Tsubaki turned back to her. "You can't fire me off haphazardly. Let me really attack him, he's strong!"

"Attack, Orihime. Kill me." Ichigo smiled. "You can always bring me back." His smile grew wider.

"Oh…" Orihime sounded so unsure. Then a look of determination flashed across her face. "Tsubaki!" She yelled, pointing towards Ichigo.

Tsubaki flashed across the air toward Ichigo. Ichigo looked toward him as he crashed into his chest and fell to the ground. Ichigo looked to the ground where he lay. He knelt over and looked down at him. "Are you okay?"

Tsubaki slowly stood. "I'm fine." His ego wounded, he flew back to Orihime and quietly yelled at her so that Ichigo couldn't attack him for it again.

"Woman!" He grabbed her face in his hands and whispered loudly. "That was the lowest killing intent I've ever seen! I didn't even cut his skin!" He pointed back to Ichigo. "I didn't even nick his clothing!"

"Yes you did!" Orihime nodded and pointed to him, her words muddled due to Tsubaki holding her face in his hands. "Look, Kurosaki-kun's inspecting his ripped clothing!"

Ichigo looked down to his uniform which had been ripped across the chest. "Hey, fairy, you ruined my uniform!"

"Damn straight I did!" Tsubaki looked back to him. "You just wait! You'll _die_ the next go!" He laughed loudly.

"Not likely," Ichigo rested the tip of his zanpakuto on the ground. "Sorry, but you're just not strong enough."

Orihime's eyes widened. Not strong enough? The words rung in her ears. Her power wasn't strong enough? Her eyes narrowed. She whispered to Tsubaki, "Tsubaki."

"What, woman?"

"_Attack_." She spoke quickly.

"Damn straight." He flew across the air lightning quick and pierced through Ichigo's skin, flying out the other side.

Ichigo's eyes widened. He looked down. Orihime brought a hand up to her mouth and took in a deep breath. "Kurosaki-kun!" She ran to him and Tsubaki flew to her, triumphant. "I'm sorry!" She stopped in front of him and inspected the tiny wound. "I've hurt you!"

"It's a mortal wound, Orihime, I might not make it." He laughed. "But I'm surprised he actually made it through my hierro. You must have had some serious intent."

"Well, you said my powers weren't enough." She looked embarrassed. "I was…defending my honor."

Tsubaki narrowed his eyes at Ichigo. "What were you saying about our power not being enough?"

"I misspoke." Ichigo raised a hand. "I might die if I don't get help soon. I feel faint." He just stood there.

"You're a horrible liar, Ichigo-kun." Orihime crossed her arms. Then she looked down to his chest. There was blood seeping from the wound. She laughed, once, then looked very worried. "I've made you bleed!"

"I really can't get another hollow uniform, this is my last one." Ichigo held his hand down to the blood on his Espada uniform. "What have you done?" He glared at her.

She flinched. "I'm…sorry."

He smiled. "No big deal."

"Why are you scary one minute and not the next!" Orihime turned around. "You make no sense to me."

"And you make no sense to me, so we're even, human." He leaned over so he was face to face with Tsubaki. "Good show little one."

"I'm not little!" Tsubaki roared back. The roar was sadly little.

"Alright, Orihime. Now I want to attack you." Ichigo took his zanpakuto in his hand. "Ready?"

"What?" Orihime turned around, surprised. "But…"

"We're sparring, aren't we?" He gripped his zanpakuto and disappeared.

Orihime's eyes widened as Ichigo appeared in front of her. "Santen Kesshun!" She held her hands up and the barrier protected her from his attack.

He looked at her from the other side of it, his zanpakuto still up against the barrier. "How often do you really fight, Orihime?"

"I…don't think that's any of your business," she looked away.

"Have you ever killed anyone?" He looked serious, stepping away.

"I've killed hollows," she answered. "I'm ready to protect myself."

"If I attacked you and really tried to kill you, would you be prepared to kill me?" He stared intently into her eyes.

She looked away. "No."

He sighed. "Why not?"

"I can't tell you, you'll get mad at me." Her shun shun rikka disappeared.

"Here." Ichigo walked forward and placed his zanpakuto in her hands. Her eyes widened.

"It's too heavy." She had a difficult time holding it up.

"Hmm…" he thought for a moment. "Just a moment." He disappeared.

"Ichigo-kun?" she spoke into the nothingness of the room. Tsubaki looked around and found nothing but Rukia and Nel sparring on the other side of the room. After a few moments Ichigo appeared again with a katana in his hand.

"Urahara lent this to you. You can't completely destroy it." He set it in her hands. "Now, fight me."

"But-"

"Oh, come on, I'm never this nice to you. Take advantage of it." He turned around for a moment to walked a bit away then turned back around. When he did he looked to Tsubaki. "You're not needed anymore fairy."

"Hey!" Tsubaki flew forward a bit.

"Tsubaki," Orihime held her hand up to her hair pins and he flew to them. She sighed and held the katana firmly in her hand. "Alright. I'll try it out."

"You should. You _do_ want to be in the Gotei 13 someday don't you?" He smiled.

Orihime's eyes widened a fraction. She hadn't thought of that. She didn't know why she hadn't thought of it, really. She pictured herself just as she had been; in the Soul Society wearing a kimono, only this time really belonging. In a squad with a real seat. She smiled a bit. Her brother would be proud.

"That makes you smile." Ichigo smiled patronizingly. "How sweet, I've made you smile."

"Shut up Ichigo." Orihime turned to him. Ichigo smiled more. Then Orihime's eyes widened and the grip on her katana loosened. "I mean, yeah."

"Talk of the future gets you thinking," Ichigo pointed out. "Does it make you think about the past?"

"So what if it does?" Orihime asked carefully. "Is there anything wrong with that?"

Ichigo laughed slightly and rested the tip of Zangetsu on the ground, leaning against it. "So everything in the world brings you back to your poor dead brother?"

Orihime's eyes narrowed a fraction. "You're being hateful." She couldn't understand why Ichigo was doing this all of the sudden. She knew that Ichigo had been cruel in the past but she didn't think that he would go this far. She didn't really want to know how much further he would go either.

Ichigo laughed again "Hateful? Orihime do you even know what I am? I _am_ hatred. It's more a part of me than anything else."

"That's not true." Orihime shook her head. "You're just _letting_ hatred be a part of you. It's _your_ choice."

Ichigo's face was full of hatred as he looked at Orihime and she was having a difficult time standing it but she had to. She stood still and bore it. She watched Ichigo as he stood in front of her and stared, silently.

"So what?" He raised a hand, finally, his angry expression never dropping. "I'm just supposed to 'choose' to be happy?"

Orihime took in a deep breath as if she were saying the answer she was about to give had been given a lot of thought beforehand. Then she looked up and him and nodded.

"Yes, Ichigo-kun. You have to make that choice to live a fulfilling life." She looked away for a moment. "You're not always happy, I'll admit that. But you're not always full of hatred either. There has to be a balance." She tried to smile back at him.

Slowly his expression turned from anger to uncertainty. He shook his head and looked up at the ceiling. "All I know is hatred. How am I supposed to go away from that?"

"You once did," Orihime pointed out. "You once lived a life full of friendship and love. You could go back to that life at any moment. We're all waiting for you."

Ichigo looked up to the ceiling. After a few moments he looked to her. "I'm leaving." Orihime's eyes were downcast. Ichigo turned around and began to leave. As he walked away he stopped for a moment. "You can call me that again."

"What?" she asked.

"That annoying name. You can call me that again. Though I don't know why it's better, first name basis is more familiar." He kept walking.

Orihime smiled wide and nodded. "Okay, Kurosaki-kun!"

"You don't have to say it all of the time," he called out as he climbed the ladder.

Orihime walked to Rukia and Nel and the three talked. They continued to spar for a while in the large, open room, the dust and the rocks moving through the air as they fought.

Ichigo left Urahara's Shoten with Orihime's words in his mind.


End file.
